


Of Roses and Chrysanthemums

by awesomecookies



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Arranged Marriage, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Engagement, Eventual Romance, Falling In Love, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mostly Ash, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Royalty, Sort Of, They're just honestly dumb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:40:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 23,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25341844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awesomecookies/pseuds/awesomecookies
Summary: And Ash really tried to appease his groom to be, as he was obviously not amused with what Ash had told him the first time around, He supposed anyone would be insulted when their fiancé told them that he would prefer doing anything else than be in a union with them, as if the thought was that repulsive. But honestly, he did try.And yet, prince Eiji stared at the bouquet with horror, like the item was that revolting simply because it had come from him. He refused to take the flowers, and instead asked him with a cutting voice “Do you really hate me so?” Before walking out on him the second time around.Now Ash would have immediately fumed at such a reaction if that wasn’t such puzzling in nature. The answer to his confusion was answered by Shorter after he relayed the events to him.“Flowers have specific meanings here in Izumo, Ash.” He too, stared at the flowers with horror. “Red spider lilies means permanent goodbyes, like when someone dies. Giving it to someone very much healthy is like wishing them bad luck. You basically told him to go die.”Ah.Well, how was Ash supposed to know that?!
Relationships: Ash Lynx & Okumura Eiji, Ash Lynx & Shorter Wong, Ash Lynx/Okumura Eiji, Griffin Callenreese & Ash Lynx, Max Lobo & Ash Lynx, Max Lobo/Jessica Randy
Comments: 79
Kudos: 305





	1. A Bouquet of Spider Lilies

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted this to be a one shot because who knew of I could finish this if I don't make it into a one shot. All my wips are glaring at me. But then I realized hashing out a 20k something fic as a one shot is a bad idea so here we go. 
> 
> Second. I'm sorry for the terrible kingdom names. I am bad at naming agshsjsj most are just old kingdom names though. Kudos to those who can figure out which country they are. 
> 
> Alright. Let's go

Aslan Jade Callenreese, Lord of Cape Cod and crown prince of the kingdom of York, was about to get married. 

"Griff, I don't even know the guy!" Prince Aslan yelled over their archery practice. The targets lined up for them to shoot at. 

"Come now Aslan. We know this day was going to come." Griffin was King of York and Aslan's brother...well half-brother. He nocked an arrow on his bow and fired, hitting the target's bull's-eye. He grinned. "You're going to be eighteen now. And building relations with the emperor to be of Izumo would be beneficial to our kingdom."

"I don't see why you can't just marry the guy if it's that important." He mumbled, nocking an arrow on his own bow. He sighed, sight narrowing to the target until his focus was nothing else but that point in the world and nothing else existed. He let lose the bow and the arrow flew. It pierced through target. 

He's aware that the way he talked to Griffin was too casual, despite him being king and him being the crown prince. (At least until Griffin decided to get married and have kids. Then his son was going to be the crown prince.) Ash was already lucky enough to be treated kindly despite being only partially royal. He was a bastard prince, and yet Griffin took him in with kindness. He treated him as his own brother, a confidant, a friend. 

But it was precisely that bond that caused Ash to be so casual with the King of York, even with the titles and the near decade age gap between them, King Griffin Callenreese, had always only been Griffin to him, as he was only Aslan to his brother.

"I thought you don't mind getting engaged with a guy?" Griffin crossed his arms. Ash rolled his eyes. Yes it's very unprincely of him. He nocked another arrow and shot the next target.

"I don't mind the guy." Ash blew his hair out of his face. He should have brought a hair tie. His blond hair was all over his eyes. "I don't want to get married at all." Ash readied his bow for another target. 

"And what's wrong with getting married?" Griffin laughed with jest.

"You're not even married yet!" Ash puffed at him, but he supposed he looked more like he was pouting.

"I have duties as King." Griffin chuckled. He always teased him even as kids. That didn't go away now. "I'm too busy to find a consort. And I have you to do the marrying."

“I’m also busy!” Ash groaned. He really shouldn’t argue. He’s probably preparing for this role since the day his mother birthed him into the world of royalty. Arrange marriages were also smart, albeit a hit or miss thing. There were trade, military defenses, political agreements and all the advantages that came with the union of two kingdoms. Ash knew this of course, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t avoid it as much as he could. He didn’t like the idea of spending the rest of his life to a stranger for the sake of his country’s prosperity.

Ash was, unfortunately, deep down, a romantic. He had at least hoped he wouldn’t need to marry into some other prince or princess’ throne. Technically he could help his kingdom in more ways than just marrying some old guy or whatever. He was well versed in politics and trade. He was a scholar. He loved to read poetry, maybe even write his own. He hoped to marry out of love or not at all.

But he knew this was what he was born for. Being a prince of this country was already fortunate of him. Many would kill to be in his position. This was already expected of him, it was his responsibility. So even if he complained about it, he was still going to do it anyway. And Griffin knew this very well.

"You don't really have a choice." Griffin watched Ash as he hit another target. "The empire had already accepted the proposal for a betrothal. They expect us to be in Izumo by the next full moon."

Ash was startled at that and he released his bow prematurely. "What?!" He missed the target and the arrow flew beyond the fields of rose bushes. One of the servants scrambled to fetch it. Ash winced at all the thorns he had to wade through, but that wasn't his priority at the moment. "You already sent it?!"

"And they accepted." Griffin grinned insufferably. "Before you complain why I haven't told you beforehand, it's because I knew you would run away or something." And he was right. Ash was probably going to cause a ruckus before agreeing. Damn it. 

Ash huffed. "I hate you sometimes." 

Griffin's expression shifted to something more serious. "I know you don't really like this Aslan, and if I could do something about it, I would have already." He patted Ash's hair. "But the council had decided it's the best route for our kingdom, and we have a responsibility as the leaders of our people. We have to make sure that we take care of them with what's best for our kingdom."

Ash couldn't really say anything about that, could he? Because Griffin obviously didn't like his position either. His brother had always been inclined with the arts, always loved poetry, and books, and music. But being king meant the sacrifice of all his hobbies for the betterments of the country. 

"Oh alright." Ash mumbled. "I'll pack my bags. The next thing you'll tell me is that we'll be boarding a ship tonight or something." 

"It's actually tomorrow." Griffin smiled and patted his shoulder. "Don't worry. Max and Shorter will be accompanying you."

"You're not coming?" Ash spluttered yet again.

Griffin shrugged. "You already know why." 

Of course. Duties to the kingdom and all that jazz. 

"Max also tells me that your husband to be is quite beautiful. He says he's exactly your type." Griffin added, eye twinkling with a tease once again.

Ash's face immediately flushed red. "W-what does that old man know!" 

Griffin's laughter bellowed around the empty field. Ash huffed once again and crossed his arms. He was getting pretty annoyed at his brother.

"Max is about my age. He's not that old." Griffin wiped the tears in his eyes. 

"I'm leaving." Ash snickered, ready to stop away. He had some packing to do.

"Oh Ash, does that mean you forfeit?"

Ash glared at Griffin before he let lose one last arrow out of spite. He made sure it pierced through Griffin's singular arrow on his target. It sliced the arrow into half while it buried itself into the bullseye.

It was worth just to see Griffin's wide eyes, surprised at that show of marksmanship. Ash smirked. He may have let his poke fun at Ash, but he would not lose in archery.

He went back to the castle half satisfied.

* * *

The next couple of days was spent on a ship and Ash was sick of it. There was only so much he could do in such a small place with nothing but the sea.

"I literally know nothing about him! I don't even know how he looks like!" Ash grumbled while he scribbled frantically on his notebook on one side and, flipping the pages of another book in the other. He might as well continue his studies if he's stuck in this ship for days more. Why did the empire of Izumo be so far away, and an island country too? 

"Max said he's beautiful, right? He ought to be." Shorter Wong was the son of an emissary from the empire of Yuan for York. He had also taken trips to Izumo occasionally. He was Ash's bestfriend. They had grown up together in York.

"Haven't you met him?" Ash sighed. The waves and the rocking of the boat were not helping his penmanship.

"Only Nadia had. She's the one who often goes to Izumo. I'm stuck in York." Shorter hummed. "She said that the crown prince is actually kind and says we have nothing to worry about. The crown prince Okumura was quite agreeable at worst and charming at best."

Agreeable at worst. Ash thought he could work with that. 

"Hey man, it's going to be alright." Shorter nudged his shoulder. Ash's smile was thin. He hoped that was the case.

"Hey hey hey. What are you doing all holed up in the cabin?" A voice called from the door. Ash glared at him. 

"What's it to you old man?" 

The man with chestnut hair grinned at him despite Ash's disgruntled face. Duke Glenreed was King Griffin's right hand man and primary advisor. He was also his childhood best friend. They both trained together in the military, went to fight battles together. Duke Maximilian Glenreed was a man of high position. But to Ash, he would always just be Max, the guy who kept teasing him as a kid. 

"Come on kid, breathe some fresh air. Also I'm not that old." Max sighed. 

"Ash here is worried about his groom to be." Shorter, the traitor, goes off to babble about his worries. Ash gave him a look of annoyance.

"Oh, worried about the married life eh?" He went and sat across Ash. "It's not so bad."

Ash huffed once again. "Duchess Jessica must be really holding you by the collar." He leveled him a smirk. "At this point I'm not surprised if she's going to take over as a member of the council and Griff's adviser."

"Hey. Don't bring my wife into this." Max snorted. "Also I absolutely support her if she wants to take my position." God he had this look of pride on his face. Lovesick bastard.

"I think you'll break my brother's heart if you do that." Ash chuckled. "He won't have any excuse to see you during his work." Max spluttered. That's probably a sore topic.

"A-anyway. Let's talk about your husband instead." He cleared his throat. "Yes, I'm sure you want to know about who you'll be spending the rest of your life with. Right, I still stand by my opinion that maybe you, prince Aslan, finally found your match."

Ash raised a brow at this. 

"The imperial prince is quite something, from what I heard." Shorter piped into the conversation. "The laws of Izumo states that the imperial prince cannot ascend the throne unless married." 

"Isn't he a little young to ascend?" He was nineteen, just a little over a year older than Ash. 

Max looked pained. "Yeah, the Emperor had fallen gravely ill. Until prince Eiji succeeds the throne, the empress and the empress dowager are the ones running the country. Although the coronation is highly anticipated." 

That must be a little daunting. Ash couldn't imagine that happens to him. Suddenly thrust into the throne, father ill, and now to be married off to a stranger. 

"It's rough." Max continued. "But it is how it is, the life of royalty."

Ash knew. He's reminded of it grimly. At every passing day, he hoped that his husband to be was tolerable at least. Ash was growing anxious. If not love, just let him be agreeable. Let him be someone kind.

* * *

By the time Ash reached the shores of Izumo, he was ready to kiss the land. Being in a boat for nearly a fortnight was bound to make you get sick of the sea at some point. He went down to the port, Shorter by his side and Max on the other. 

"Your highness, prince Aslan of York, welcome to Izumo. I am lord Ibe, pleasure to meet you." A man with dark hair, a beard and dark eyes bowed to them in greetingby the port, along with the entire royal entourage of Izumo. Many gathered to see him, people wearing traditional robes with colorful patterns all over them. The country was warmer than York, and it was so different from everything he's seen before. There were flowers everywhere. Not like the fields of York where Ash played. Ash didn't know where to look first. "I was sent here by the imperial family to escort you back to the imperial palace."

"Prince Aslan of York. It is an honor to be here." Ash bowed back in respect. The man--Ibe smiled. 

"Shunichi! It's nice to see you again my friend!" Max laughed and immediately hugged the man in lieu of a formal address. Lord Ibe looked a little surprised and he tensed up upon contact, but soon enough relaxed and returned the gesture. Ash supposed the people of Izumo was not so keen with skinship. 

"It's nice to see you too Max." Lord Ibe smiled as he pulled away. Then he turned to Ash. "I suppose you're all tired from the journey. Let us proceeded to the imperial palace so that you may rest."

With that, they all sat on the royal carriage and went ahead. Ash said little on the journey, tuning out whatever Shorter was saying to him. Max and Lord Ibe was in another carriage. Ash was mostly peeking at the window, taking in the view of the city, the view of his kingdom to be. He will become emperor consort when he was married and he would lead an empire he barely knew, next to a man he hasn't ever met. 

He tried not to think about that though. For now he took in the scenery, the curious faces of the people, the rich colored robes that were so different from York. The scents and the lights, the architecture, the language. It was overwhelming. 

Time passed and he could see the imperial palace up ahead. It wasn't anything like his castle at home. It looked sharp, unyielding, prudish. He didn't know what to make of it. 

He was greeted by the guard and the royal servants, and after a flurry of people and greetings, more formal addressing and some rites and rituals of meeting new people that Ash could not be bothered at the moment, he was finally given time alone to rest.

He did notice that his betrothed was noticeably absent.

"The imperial prince cannot greet you at the moment, unfortunately." Some servant told him as he led him to his chambers. He was barely fluent in the language of York, but it was better than Ash's grasp at Izumo's language. "I was told that he had an important last minute errand to run."

Ash felt something inside him sigh in relief.

Although he was tired, he didn't exactly want to go to bed, the gods knew he was already confined in bed for weeks after nowhere to go in the sea. No, Ash wanted to walk around. Preferably somewhere with grass and trees. 

"Oh your highness, our place has some lovely gardens for you to walk around. Should I ask some servants to walk with you?" 

Ash likes the idea of a garden. But he didn't like servants following him. Just for once, he wanted to be alone before he was bound forever by duty, so he politely declined.

"I wish to walk on my own." The servant looked surprised, but he said nothing. He bowed, led Ash to the gardens before telling him where and who to ask should he he need something. 

Now Ash was alone, Shorter passed out in his own bed, and Max was off catching up with Lord Ibe who he had met and befriended previously from his constant stay in Izumo. The fresh air was lovely, and the place was warmer unike the chill that York brought from its breeze. Perhaps he could like this country. Perhaps he could live here, basking under the sun, breathing in the scent of the flowers.

And the imperial gardens had so many flowers. Different colors, and different exotic plants that Ash hadn't seen before. He knew one that looked familiar though. Chrysanthemums. They were the imperial seal of the royal family so Ash knew this very well. They took majority of the garden. There was a clear pond refecting the sun with koi fishes circling the waters lazily, and along it was a pagoda and a bridge. Ash enjoyed the serene and tranquil place. 

Yes. Ash believed he could stay here, if just for this garden. Ash sighed and perhaps he would have fallen asleep under the shade of the pagoda while he sat on a bench if he had not heard the barking of a dog. 

Ash's eyes shot open, curious of the sound. It was no doubt a dog, happily trotting around the garden, hidden behind a thicket of bushes and trees. A beautiful creature with golden hair, and next to him a little boy with messy worn down robes sitting on the grass. The boy was holding a small canvas and a tray of paints. 

Ash was intrigued. He peeked through the bushes to observe him clearer. He was a little kid, perhaps fourteen or sixteen of age if he had to guess. He had his back on Ash. His hair was messy and let loose. Shoulder length hair, straight and thick, Ash had the urge to run through it with his fingers. The boy giggled when the dog prodded his nose on his cheek, he turned around and admonished him in a language Ash did not understand. And oh, the boy was adorable. He had slightly chubby cheeks, sun kissed and yet still a little pale to be tan unlike Ash's own fair skin. His skin looked soft to touch. Ash wondered who the boy was. Perhaps he was the palace's gardener, or the gardener's son.

He had thick lashes that fanned on his face, pink lips that made his smile more beautiful, now parted in a slight o shape. And hypnotic dark eyes that seemed unfathomable.

Oh.

Their eyes had met and the boy had seen him. He looked surprised and confused. 

"Umm." Ash laughed nervously. "Hi. Sorry for intruding." Oh wow, his face was burning in embarrassment and guilt, especially with how the boy looked scared. Perhaps he's never seen someone from York before.

"I'm Ash. Err I mean prince Aslan of York." He tried to appease the boy. He moved closer, slowly approaching him. "Are you the gardener? The flowers are very beautiful. I haven't seen anything like them. Especially the chrysanthemums."

The boy continued to stare at him.

Ash wanted to scold himself. The boy probably did not understand him. He want going to try and speak in their language though, he thought he had already made a fool of himself enough. Plus the way the boy stated at him stole all of Ash's common sense and logic. Part of that was his grasp and vocabulary. It was hopeless to say anything in a different language.

"Umm. Don't be scared. I won't harm you." Ash believed he was incapable of doing so when the boy looked at him like that. The boy said nothing though. "May I sit next to you?"

The boy at the very least understood what Ash was trying to convey and patted the space next to him. Ash immediately sat next to him with enough distance so as to not scare him away. 

There was an uncomfortable silence. The boy but his lip and stared at the canvas. It was a beautiful painting of the garden, half-finished but still exquisite. Ash was in awe. 

"I like the painting." He offered. The boy said nothing, he continued to stare at him. He's been doing that since the beginning, as if he was searching for something, curious, scrutinizing him with his depthless eyes.

"I think this is nice." Ash decided to fill the silence by conversing even if the boy did not understand. "I wanted to make at least one friend here. I don't know any of the people here, and I barely speak your language. It can be a little...terrifying." He chuckled sadly. "What is the imperial prince like? I know nothing about him and I think I'd rather not be married off to someone terrible. Truth be told, I did not really want to be married, and I would rather do anything to be but--" He broke off. "Well. We have duties to our kingdoms. I'm sure the prince wouldn't want me if he was to choose either. I don't know what to expect. The best I could hope from a marriage of convenience is to hope they aren't a monster, yes? Most of my expectation is hoping that he's tolerable at the very least but I'm also afraid of being disappointed."

Oh what was he doing? The poor boy did not understand a single word he was saying. The look on the boy's face was pale and almost horrified. He should stop bothering the poor boy now.

"Ah it doesn't matter I suppose." Ash laughed it off. "It's not like you understand what I'm saying. Thank you though, I instantly felt better. Maybe I should talk more to you if I can find you even after I'm married. I hope the prince doesn't mind." Then as a joke he added. "Maybe I'll make you my mistress. I'm sure the prince would get himself another lover after the first year of our marriage." Ah yeah. Like he's actually going to do that. He'll probably throw himself into work or something so he wouldn't feel too lonely. 

The boy shot up to his feet, looked at Ash before hastily bowing and running away. The dog had ran run after him. Ash sighed at the slowly vanishing figure. He wondered if he was going to see him again. Maybe if he was already settled, he'll ask the other servants about the gardener.

* * *

"Ash, can you stop fidgeting with your collar?" Shorter sighed. "Relax, it's going to be okay."

It was almost time for dinner and before the actual dining could happen, Ash had to present himself before the empress, empress dowager, and of course, the imperial prince. Ash was meeting his husband to be. Of course he was nervous!

He wore a fancy coat fit to face fellow royals. His hair was definitely styled. First impressions were important. First impressions makes or breaks this alliance and possibly the relationship between him and his husband to be. Ash wasn't nervous. He was terrified. 

He waited outside a sitting room where his presence would be announced, then he'd walk into the hall, bow before the monarchs and greet them respectfully. Easy. He took a deep breath, his feet carried him over to where he needed to be. He said what he needed to said and--

Wasn't that the dog from the gardens?

Ash blinked at it. 

It was. It had the same golden hair and the same happy smile.

"Prince Aslan, we are most happy to have you in our palace.” The Empress dowager spoke.

“As it is an honor for me.” For the first time, Ash was able to see the imperial family of Izumo. There was the empress dowager in the center, seated on a cushion, hands folded neatly on her lap. Next to her was the current empress Okumura. She was younger than the dowager and her face was sharp, intelligent. Ash was a little intimidated. Next was a little girl who looked alike the empress, except she had more fire in her expression. He reminded Ash of himself as a kid. Ash held back a smile. Lastly there was none left but his husband, and now he was going to get a good look at him for the first time.

Ash forced himself to look at the man’s face.

Oh. Ash thought, with a sudden jolt of surprise.

His husband to be was stunning, there was no doubt about that at all. Soft rosy cheeks, smooth unblemished skin that’s a little sun kissed. He had pink lips pressed against each other thinly. Dark eyes that was deep and unfathomable, staring at him with curiosity. Lastly, his hair was done in a bun, the crown of the imperial prince sat on his hair, matching his robes, both dotted with golden chrysanthemums. Ash wondered if he was to wear that when he was married. But that was the least of Ash’s problems because as stunning as his husband to be was, Ash realized that this was the exact boy he found in the gardens, staring back at him.

“Prince Aslan, this is the imperial crown prince of Izumo, heir to the throne, and my son, Eiji.” The empress Okumura introduced. There was no mistaking it. The boy—no man (he was older than Ash after all despite it far from being obvious) bowed to him, lips stretched into a thin, yet displeased smile.

“Prince Aslan, it is an honor to finally meet you.” He said in perfect and fluent York, albeit the accent still there. Ash knew then that he understood everything Ash had told him from the garden. “I hope we find each other agreeable whilst fulfilling our duties to our kingdoms.” The last part was definitely a jab to Ash. There was no doubt about it, prince Eiji’s gaze was cold, his smile definitely cutting.

Ash bristled at it.

Somewhere inside him, his chest sank in the realization that his marriage was doomed after all before it even began.

* * *

Dinner had been a terrible affair for Ash, especially with how he kept glancing over his betrothed and seeing an impenetrable wall. The man was so good at plastering a gentle smile when he was obviously displeased deep down. It was scaring Ash.

He did try to make amends though, and he thought of meeting him the next day to make amendments. Ash was in the garden once again where prince Eiji often stayed at that certain time of the day, as what the servants said. He had picked up a bouquet red spider lilies for the prince since roses weren’t available, and with his botched up use of their language, he would take whatever he could.

Red roses were Ash's favorite. He could start there right? And maybe they could walk in the gardens where they met and Ash would ask him his favorite flowers, clear up the misunderstanding and hopefully build a happy relationship.

And Ash really tried to appease his groom to be, as he was obviously not amused with what Ash had told him the first time around, He supposed anyone would be insulted when their fiancé told them that he would prefer doing anything else than be in a union with them, as if the thought was that repulsive. But honestly, he did try.

And yet, prince Eiji stared at the bouquet with horror, like the item was _that_ revolting simply because it had come from him. He refused to take the flowers, and instead asked him with a cutting voice “Do you really hate me so?” Before walking out on him the second time around.

Now Ash would have immediately fumed at such a reaction if that wasn’t such puzzling in nature. The answer to his confusion was answered by Shorter after he relayed the events to him.

“Flowers have specific meanings here in Izumo, Ash.” He too, stared at the flowers with horror. “Red spider lilies means permanent goodbyes, like when someone dies. Giving it to someone very much healthy is like wishing them bad luck. You basically told him to go die.”

Ah.

Well, how was Ash supposed to know that?!

Ash groaned to himself. He was singlehandedly sabotaging this marriage and alliance. Griffin was going to haul his ass back to York, and if he was that unlucky, he might actually end up causing a war between the two countries. Why was this so difficult? Ash was really doing his best. But it also seemed like prince EIji wasn’t interested in contributing to the work. He was distant, avoiding Ash since that flower incident. Ash swore he saw him turn around and run away when he saw him from the other side of the hall. Their conversations, assuming they even last beyond three sentences, were lacking warmth, stilted, awkward.

So Ash avoided talking to Eiji in the months where he had to stay in Izumo. Which was a little disheartening. He had hoped to be learning about his betrothed by now. Instead, here he was, hiding away in his room and writing letters to Griffin about it. They do meet at dinner, but that was about that. The last time they were together in a room was when Ash presented his engagement gift last week, a lovely jade necklace. Eiji thanked him as what was expected of him, but said no other words after that.

Either way, Ash really avoided bumping into him unless necessary. He was busy for his succession and learning everything he could to get ready to lead his country after all. And after their marriage, it would soon be Ash’s country as well.

Ash would be lying if he said that he didn’t regret their situation. He wished he could at least be in good terms with his husband to be, and that he wouldn’t be trapped in this palace for the rest of his life, missing York and Griffin until either grief or loneliness would take him. If he could at least be friends with Prince Eiji, life here would be tolerable after all.

But part of him also had beastly wants and closely held secrets he did not want to say. Foolish desires, and one of them was that maybe, maybe he and Eiji would somehow fall in love despite the rocky beginning, and they’d find that they were meant to be after all, some kind of soulmates amongst the parallel universes that existed like theirs.

And yet prince Eiji was nowhere near that. He could be unknowingly cruel, with his untouchable beauty and his sharp edges, the way he seemed to be able to destroy Ash in a single stare, the way Ash was ready to offer his heart to him should he want it, should he show some slightest traces of wanting it, because Ash was a romantic deep down despite how cynical he showed himself to be.

Ash feared Eiji Okumura.

He wondered if he could ever see what was beyond that impenetrable stare, that unfathomable eyes, if he would ever be able to understand the enigma that was Eiji Okumura, or if he was doomed to seeing him through a frosted window after all with naught but impressions on the foggy glass. He wondered if there was anyone out there who could.


	2. A single red rose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash had woken up with the world ending.
> 
> Or at least he had wished it was.
> 
> His head was pounding, his mouth dry as if his tongue was sandpaper. His skin also felt sticky and tight, his limbs ached. 
> 
> He buried his face into whatever it was that he was holding, the warm thing between his arms. It was his wedding night, coronation and birthday yesterday, surely the world could go sort themselves for now. May the universe give him a well needed break. 
> 
> The warm thing between his arms groaned. It also shuffled into a better position. Ash was almost certain pillows don't usually do that. They most definitely do not grumble about how heavy he was.
> 
> Ash's eyes shot open. Long silky hair greeted him, they spilled over the crisp white sheets, a hint of smooth skin teased him as a shoulder peeked out of a sleeve. He then realized that he was draped all over a person. 
> 
> It was his husband. 
> 
> Oh god he was hugging prince Eiji.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shhhh its 7 am here. I have not slept. I'll add more notes later

Here’s the thing though, eventually, they do get married.

It was both their duty to look happy and pretend it was such a joyous day. The kingdom of York and the empire of Izumo are now tied together in a union, a bond consecrated by matrimony. The Callenreese-Okumura line is now a strong political alliance among the world. It should be a joyous day.

It’s a load of bull in Ash’s opinion.

There were two other celebrations on that same day as well. The other, Eiji’s coronation and ascent to throne immediately after their wedding ceremony, and lastly, Ash’s birthday. He even had to sacrifice his own birthday now. Wasn’t that lovely?

But he had trained for this his entire life, and he knew how to smile to the people, wave at just the right angle, and act as if he was happy. He suspected Eiji had as well. The imperial prince was even more devastatingly handsome in his regal robes. Ash was asked to wear Izumo’s wedding garments as well, and so he was dressed in a white robe called shirumuku and a wataboshi on his head. Apparently, he realized as he stared at himself in the mirror stuffed in so many layers of clothing, he was the bride. Sort of. 

The ceremony was long. Ash was not sure of the rituals that had happened, but he had practiced this beforehand, or at least practiced his vows and his lines. There were so many rituals of fertility, which Ash thought was funny, considering they were both men, but regardless. They exchanged rings, a silver band with a huge crystal that was way too extravagant for Ash's taste. The kiss was short, tight lipped, more of a peck or a quick press of their lips against each other. Not that it mattered. That was all they needed, and the head priest was satisfied.

From then on, Ash was a married man.

How surreal.

He didn’t have time to contemplate that though as he was whisked away into a room to wear a different garment. It was red, and lighter than the first gown, called a hikifurisode. And Eiji worn a different robe for his coronation, a more decorated and more regal one. The whole thing was a flurry of events. Ash remembered watching Eiji walk unto the platform, swearing an oath to his country. 

That was his husband, Ash thought distantly, and his husband waited for him as he ascended next to him. It was his turn to say the vows, pledging alliance to his husband, to this empire. The high priest had declared it, a new crown sat on his plaited hair, one that matched Eiji’s as well. This one had golden chrysanthemums carved on it, a symbol of the empire. 

Eiji was now emperor of Izumo. And Ash was his emperor consort.

In a single day Ash had gained a husband, a throne and he had just turned eighteen.

It was unimaginable.

* * *

“Cheer up Aslan. It’s your birthday.”

The good part among all this at least, was that Griffin needed to attend the ceremony as part of his work, and Ash had an excuse to spend time with his brother. They had spent time together for the past two weeks before the wedding. He dreaded the day Griffin had to go back.

“I don’t even think I can celebrate it anymore at this point Griff.” Ash kept his grumbling to a minimum. He eyed his husband across the room, speaking with the feudal lords of his empire—their empire, chatting easily in their wedding banquet unlike Ash who doesn't at all belong. Somehow, he was still so handsome despite the weariness of this hectic day.

“Here, take this from me at least.” Griffin slid a box to him. “Happy birthday.”

Ash felt his chest crack. “You didn’t need to.” But he appreciated it anyway, and he was glad to accept anything from his brother, anything to remind him of home. And perhaps Griffin knew about the possibility of his homesickness as he gave him a flowers from their garden encased in a crystal bottle and resin so it would be preserved forever. A red rose from Ash's favorite field. He didn't know if that should cheer him up or make him cry.

“Don’t be nervous for later.” Griffin laughed.

“Later?” Ash tore his eyes away from his gift.

“Aslan, it’s your wedding night. You have to consummate your wedding in your bed. Otherwise the whole ceremony is null.” Griffin’s eyes were twinkling with mischief. Ash felt his whole face turn red with heat.

“I—I—do we really need to?!” Ash spluttered. He totally forgot about that detail. The idea of being beneath Eiji, pressed against the marriage bed, flushed and perhaps wanting was something he could not imagine doing. He eyed his husband bashfully, his stance was stiff, his expression gentle yet still lacking warmth. Ash could spot a face that was pretending from a mile away. He knew Eiji was not showing his true face.

“You know, you’re acting a lot like Max on his wedding night.” Griffin raised a brow. Ash wasn’t so old then, but he did remember Griffin laughing at Max’s nervous face at the night of his wedding. The new Duchess Glenreed stared at him as if he was going to consume him on the spot, a wicked grin on her face. Ash swallowed. He supposed that was his situation right now as well. Not that he'd admit it.

“This is different Griff.” Ash insisted, because although Duchess Jessica was a force to be reckoned with, and would definitely bite those who would do her wrong, Eiji would devour you in an instant, wreck you, and leave you to crumble before him. Perhaps he'd even laugh while it happened.

“Perhaps you simply did not get to know your husband enough. He seemed like a very pleasant man when I talked to him.”

“He didn’t even let me get to know him!” Ash hissed. Whenever he had tried to, Eiji met him with closed doors. He gulped down the wine in his goblet, wincing at the burn of the alcohol.

“You have time for it now though.” Griffin pointed out. “After all, you both have each other for the rest of your lives.”

And yes, Griffin was technically right. They did have each other now, and they were stuck with each other till the end. But that thought was just so daunting wasn’t it? Forever was such a long thing, and yet so quickly passed as well. Forever was just as unfathomable as Eiji’s eyes, as depthless, as larger than life. And if they don’t get along, what then?

Ash did not want to think about it. The responsibility, the future, the implication of forever, even the damn marriage bed. Especially the marriage bed, as it was his most pressing matters as of the moment. He kept drinking to stave off his nerves.

By the end of the night, he was sure he was brought to his sleeping chambers. He was also sure that Eiji was with him when it happened.

He did not remember the act of consummation though.

* * *

Ash had woken up with the world ending.

Or at least he had wished it was.

His head was pounding, his mouth dry as if his tongue was sandpaper. His skin also felt sticky and tight, his limbs ached. 

He buried his face into whatever it was that he was holding, the warm thing between his arms. It was his wedding night, coronation and birthday yesterday, surely the world could go sort themselves for now. May the universe give him a well needed break. 

The warm thing between his arms groaned. It also shuffled into a better position. Ash was almost certain pillows don't usually do that. They most definitely do not grumble about how heavy he was.

Ash's eyes shot open. Long silky hair greeted him, they spilled over the crisp white sheets, a hint of smooth skin teased him as a shoulder peeked out of a sleeve. He then realized that he was draped all over a person. 

It was his husband. 

Oh god he was hugging prince Eiji.

Or emperor Eiji he supposed.

Ash scrambled away, but then his head pounded and he immediately grew dizzy. He wanted to throw up, oh gods help him. 

What happened? He remembered drinking glass after glass. He remembered arguing with Max for something. He remembered challenging Shorter to a drink off. He remembered winning, and he remembered glass after glass after glass after that. And then at some point he was brought to his marriage bed to wait for his husband to take him. Eiji had entered the room after an eternity, dark eyes staring at him under the dim light.

And then...

And then what?

Had he given his virginity without even remembering it? Did he have sex while drunk? It shouldn't be that scandalous he supposed. It was his husband's right after all, and yet Ash was a little sad about it. Strange, considering he was wishing to just get over it the other night. No matter how much he wished to suppress it, he supposed, his desires to be loved always pulled through, and he wanted. Oh gods he wanted so desperately to share the bed with someone he really loves, not just someone who was obliged to do it.

Ash ran a hand through his face, calming his breaths. What does one do after their marriage night anyway? Most romance books would show the newly married couple to wake up in each other's arms and be mushy to each other. Not like that could happen to them. Ash contemplated leaving, but that also seemed rude.

"We didn't do anything, if that's what you're worried about." 

Ash snapped towards the voice coming from the body next to him. The emperor did not face him, he did not look at him when he said this. He sighed. "As much as you think so little of me, I don't want to take advantage of intoxicated men, even if we are married. I'm not that monstrous."

Ash bit his lip. He was grateful at least. Part of him was relieved that nothing happened. He was glad Eiji was a gentleman enough to make sure Ash was comfortable, to not take advantage of him while drunk. But it seemed like he was still bothered by what Ash had said in the garden, like he was still harboring most of his ill will from that. "I don't think so little of you." 

This time Eiji did look at him, eyes wide, blinking at him. They shined under the lights, making them sparkle. "Your actions speak otherwise."

Ash whimpered. "I didn't mean for you to hear." He murmured. "I thought you didn't understand. A word I was saying."

That didn't sound like the right thing today because Eiji was now flushed red. "I see. You mean you were planning to gossip about me to a servant of my own palace?" He narrowed his eyes at him accusingly. 

"No!" Ash spluttered. Gods why was it so hard to talk to this man without starting some kind of misunderstanding? "I mean--I wasn't able to explain myself properly! I wouldn't have said that if I knew it was you I was talking to."

"So you'd rather not tell me what you think, and say that behind my back." Eiji was close to glaring at him. 

"Oh gods no. Stop taking my words out of context." 

Eiji got up to his feet. He was wearing a loose white robe, hair draped on his shoulders like a waterfall, as let free as the day he first met him. The robe parted just enough for Ash to see his smooth chest. How was he still lovely to behold despite just waking up? How was he still stunning despite looking at Ash that way? 

"I think I have heard enough." Eiji sighed. "I don't think I would bother anymore, considering you cried the moment I got into bed with you. I think it's quite clear that you dislike me so much from that alone."

Ash wondered if that was the case. He couldn't recall what happened. Did he really cry?

"Look if this is about what I said in that garden, I was nervous alright? I didn't know who I was going to be married to. I don't even know your language enough. I just arrived." Ash groaned. "And then you were there, the first friendly looking face I saw and then I thought could make a friend, but surprise, you were the crown prince--" Ash clamped his mouth shut, realization dawning on him. "Hold on, you already knew who I was, why didn't you say anything?"

Eiji's eyes widened, stare faltering. "I didn't have the chance to."

"You had plenty of chances to." Ash deadpanned. "You were flustered and quiet the whole damn time, I thought you were a kid."

Now Eiji spluttered. "I'm not taking that from someone who cried on my lap last night! Saying how you're afraid and inexperienced, blushing and weeping. It was almost adorable. You should look more like that. It suits you " And he leveled Ash with an amused smirk. "Does sex scare you that much?"

Those words did nothing but spark frustrations within Ash. But also, some part of him was indignant with what he has said.

"I-it's not like you are any better!" Ash was now red in the face. "I'm not the only blushing virgin in this room."

But the emperor have him a funny look, brow arched in a way that could only mean one thing. Realization dawned on Ash. How scandalous. There was an arrogant smirk in his lips, and Ash did not know what to say to that. He had no retort. 

Ash hated that.

Ash also realized that this was the first full conversation he had exchanged with his husband since the day he got here.

* * *

No they didn't try to consummate the marriage again after that, and Ash had not yet moved in to Eiji's room despite already married. He insisted to sleep in his own chambers, mostly because he couldn't think of how he would face the man again, at least not without turning red.

The only time they actually meet was between ceremonies and festivities, or when official meetings occurred. Ash had learned all about them in his stay in Izumo, the traditions, the customs, the rules and all the things that being the head of a state needed to learn. Shorter had sat through him with it, together with lord Ibe. With all the gods Izumo worshiped and honor, there were festivities almost every day. As ruler of the land, the emperor had duties to the gods. As the emperor consort, Ash had to serve them as well. And so he was seated next to the emperor, overlooking at the people, the rites, and the dancing in their banquet hall.

Today, Ash was wearing another traditional robe with too many layers. It could be a little suffocating despite the softness of the material. This time his long hair was tied in a small bun adorned with golden hair clips and a crown that the empress used to wear. Powder and rouge were smudged all over his face, his eyes lined with kohl. It felt awkward.

He sneaked a glance at Eiji who was in his own set of robes. He wasn't as decorated as him, but he was so regal in his crown, hair also pulled into a bun. He was in his complete imperial regalia. Ash wouldn't lie. He did look lovely. Though he has yet to fill in the garments, still a little unsure and tense when scrutinized.

"Like what you see?"

Eiji said with an upturn on his lips. He was still observing the crowds, but he very well knew he was amsued by Ash.

"I don't know what you mean." Ash snickered. How unprincely. "I'm seeing a kid playing dress up."

"And I'm seeing a courtesan sitting next to me." Eiji huffed in retort.

"Too bad. Young kids can't play with me just yet." Ash laughed. "Come back in ten years, you might finally pass off as a teenager."

"That's some bold words coming from you. At least I--" and at this, the emperor finally looked at him. "Didn’t cry in my marriage bed."

Oh god. Did he have to bring that up all the time? "Your insults are becoming stale, your highness."

"I'm not insulting anyone." Eiji fluttered his lashes. "I'm simply stating facts." And then he winked.

Insufferable.

His husband, beneath all that indifferent exterior, apparently had a bastard side. Honestly, Ash didn't know what he preferred. There was a funny twinkle in his husband's eyes, a teasing glint. Ash knew exactly what he was thinking about. 

But at least he was no longer cold to Ash right? At least he didn't look at Ash as if he wanted to eviscerate him on the spot. That should be considered an improvement, despite Eiji suddenly becoming insufferable around him. It's only been what? Half a year since they met? By the time Ash was wrinkled, they'd probably be amiable enough to share a drink without wanting to deck each other's face.

Though, Ash wasn't so sure if it was an improvement. He realized that his husband could grate on his nerves if he wanted to, make him want to tear his hair apart, now that they didn't actively avoided each other. A good example was how he was looking at him right now.

Ever since that disaster of a wedding night and the morning after, that's how Eiji had been glancing at him, from across the room in a meeting, next to him in a banquet, even on certain occasions where they meet each other along the hallway by chance. It could be infuriating sometimes, that knowing look, sardonic, yet not entirely cruel, just teasing with a hint of mockery.

Most of the time they have private time alone though, they’re often spent hurling insults at each other, arguing over nonsensical things Ash couldn’t even be bothered to remember. But he did remember how Eiji would frown at his words, and the way he turned red when Ash hits the right place with his statements enough to embarrass him. Ash could not forget the way his lips stretches into grin to show off his pearly white teeth when it was Ash who doesn’t have a reply. Oh the number of times he’s rendered Ash speechless. At least they were talking now. Somehow. Then he would chuckle, and Ash would think that maybe it wasn’t so bad after all, maybe Ash could spend the rest of his life like this.

His husband tipped his chin up smugly at him, just as they watched one of the noble lords carry off his groom to their marriage bed. Attending the weddings of high member councils were also part of their duties.

“Hopefully he wouldn’t weep in the bed like someone we know, huh.” He whispered using Ash’s own tongue, as they always conversed in with Ash not fluent with Eiji’s. On one hand it gave them privacy, but on the other, it hit Ash harder.

Ash took it back. His husband was an asshole.

* * *

One of Ash's duties as emperor consort, was to greet foreign dignitaries. Usually the emperor would accompany him, but as it was, Eiji was busy with some other meeting. So Ash was left to endure this rather....annoying princess from the duchy of Kiev. 

"The gardens are exquisite, but honestly I don't understand why you have to keep such ugly plants." She sniffed at the dark leaves with disdain. She's treated most of the things she's seen in the kingdom with the same reaction and honestly, it's been grating on Ash's nerves. 

"These are Izumo's imperial nursery. They grow all kinds of medicinal herbs. Some of them are imported from Yuan, and others go as far as York, Burma, Goreyo and Ceylon." Ash pasted a smile. 

"I think Kiev has a better collection of herbs." And Ash ground his teeth. She goes on and on about how her duchy is superior to this empire, always interrupting Ash's explanations with anecdotes of her own that could go on for hours. It was exhausting Ash. 

"I think it's time for a cup of tea." Ash's smile was menacing at this point. But the princess was still oblivious to it. Ash was certain that of he had to spend another hour with her, he would end up lodging a chopstick in her throat.

He'd do anything to get out of this.

"What did you say was the emperor doing again? It's terribly rude to not greet royal guests." The princess inspected the dango in her hand. Ash wanted to snap at her that it was she being the rude one, and Ash would not blame Eiji for trying to escape this responsibility despite how unfair it was. Ash probably would have done the same.

Just then, a servant came and bowed to them. "I'm sorry your highnesses, I don't mean to interrupt. But I was ordered by his royal highness, the emperor to call upon his emperor consort."

Ash raised a brow. "Did he say why?" Eiji calling him was rare. He's never done so unless important, and even that was unlikely to happen.

The servant shook his head. "No. He did not say, your highness. He did however say to escort the princess Natalya to the royal bathhouse. He was certain she would enjoy the pampering there." 

The princess looked delighted. Ash sighed in relief. Yes. He was more than willing to leave this insufferable woman behind and spend time with his insufferable husband instead, just to get away. 

He bowed to the princess, quick to his feet. "I better not keep his highness waiting." And then left as quick as it was legally allowed. He swore he would've bolted if it was only allowed.

A servant had lead him to the library where Eiji was seated on his desk, busy writing something on a parchment.

"Your highness. You summoned for me?"

Eiji looked up and waved his hand. "Good. You can do whatever you want."

Ash furrowed his brows. "Excuse me?"

Eiji sighed. He was wearing wire framed glasses. His fingers pushed them to the bridge of his nose. "I didn't really need you. You can do whatever you want."

That's starting to irk Ash.

"You called me here for nothing?"

Now Eiji chuckled. "I didn't know you enjoyed the princess of Kiev's company so much. From what I heard, you were near resorting to murder." And then the amused look was back. He picked his brush back and dipped it gently on the ink, continuing his work. 

"Did you worry I'll end up sabotaging your international relations?" Ash scoffed. He wasn't sure why Eiji did that. It's the only thing he could think of. 

"Please," He smiled. "I know exactly how tiresome it is to deal with her. If anything, I'm doing you a favor." His gaze slid back to his. "I would appreciate it if you wouldn't say anything about it to anyone." Then he had the audacity to wink.

Ash paused at the thought. Eiji called him here so he could play hooky on his duties. There's that childish twinkle in his eyes, a mischievous smile, a conspiratorial grin. "She complained about the matcha again didn't she?" He continued.

Ash groaned. "Among all the other things, yes."

"Yeah. I thought so." Eiji snorted. "She does that every single time." He sighed exasperatedly. Ash wondered how long Eiji had to deal with it for him to act like this. He could picture out a younger boy entertaining such an insufferable guest around, looking unamused. 

Ash couldn't help it.

He burst out into laughter.

* * *

Ash learned his husband had a streak of mischief. Ash was learning a lot about his husband in the past couple of months. He thought that it was a good thing. They don't spend much time together, but when they do it wasn't as bad as before, especially after that event.

His husband's tendency for mischief wasn't even noticeable unless you look closely, when you observe him properly. You would only notice it if you knew him. His calm and innocent face simply did not reveal him to be the type, but Ash supposed that just played to his favor.

"Ah, I speak only Izumese." He waved at yet another obnoxious foreign dignitary in a banquet, shooting Ash a wink, and then proceeded to act like he could not understand the common tongue when Ash knew damn well he did. He's been giving Eiji an unimpressed look since the start of the night.

"People tend to say what they truly think and want without filter when you act innocent." Eiji explained when they were riding back to their palace in the imperial carriage. "And they tend to avoid talking to you when you act like you don't understand. It's handy for the people you don't like." He smiled to himself. He had his hands folded on his lap, gaze peeking outside the moving carriage.

Incredulous, Ash asked. "Does that often work?" 

But then the man across him chuckled. "What do you think?" He shot him a funny look. Then after that he went ahead to exit the carriage upon their arrival, leaving Ash to contemplate his words.

"Hold on." Ash spluttered. "Is that why you didn't say anything in the garden?" He was tempted to run after the retreating figure. "Your highness!"

Oh that was just great, he thought. The man was chuckling to himself now. Ash really could not stand the man sometimes. 

He had other quirks as well. One night, Ash’s duties had caused him to stay up late in one of study rooms. He was learning more about the policies of this empire, it's history, traditions, economic growth, infrastructure plans, foreign relations, military trainings. Not to mention he had to learn the languages which has yet to be fluent. There was a lot of things he had to work on, and he had to work the extra mile if he wanted to learn fast.

Plus he did not want to offend anyone with a repeat of the flower incident. 

He was deep in his studies when he was sure he heard something.

There was some grunting, and then some creaking. After that, the window in the study slid open to reveal dark disheveled hair and dark robes, slipping inside the room with a sigh. His hair was tied in a simple messy bun. No ornaments were clipped on his hair. Even the robes were a little shabby.

But Ash knew this man. He knew this look. It had haunted him ever since. 

"Your highness?" 

Eiji snapped to his direction, eyes wide in surprise. He wore the servant's garments where he's easily mistaken as a one if he tried hard enough. On one hand, he had clutched a tray of paints and a canvas on one hand, a brush in between his teeth. He looked like a kid who was caught sneaking out. Maybe in some way, he was. 

"What are you doing?!" Ash continued to ask when he was not given an answer. It was surreal to see the emperor of the entire land, climb up from a window out of nowhere. Sure the place wasn't built tall, but Ash knew falling from such a height could still end up to your death. It was insane.

"Shhh." The emperor waved his hand, suddenly setting the canvas, brush, and paints on the floor and grabbing a bunch of books. "If anyone asks, do not say anything about it." He whispered. Just then, the door to the study opened one of the servants bowed before Ash.

"It's the tea you had requested for, your highness." He said, bringing with him a pot of green tea and mochi. Ash knew him. He was one of the few servants who knew how to speak in York.

Ash waved his hand in thanks, gesturing for them to place it on the desk. Before he did though, he asked. "I'm terribly sorry to interrupt once again your highness, but I'm here to check if his majesty, the emperor came by this evening. He's not in his chambers and the imperial princess is looking for him." 

Ash's eyes slid unto Eiji who was bowing down at him, eyes lowered and looking absolutely servile. His eyes urged him not to say anything though.

"No. I haven't seen him. I was here the entire time and nobody came by." He lied. Ash could see Eiji's grateful look.

"Alright my lord. I'll be leaving now." The servant bowed. But before he left, he barked something to Eiji in their language. Eiji straightened up, picked up the pot and poured Ash a cup of tea. 

The servant looked satisfied and left. Now Ash wondered if he knew he just yelled at his emperor. If he did, he would probably fall to his knees and beg not to have his head cut off. Ash felt a little bad. He looked back at Eiji who snickered as he set the pot back on the table. He didn't seem to mind. "Thank you." He swiped a mochi from Ash's plate. 

"What was that about?" 

Eiji ran a hand through his messy hair. "Playing hooky." He responded. "Fooling around. Something like that."

Ash gaped at him as if he was crazy. "Did you climb up from the ground?" 

"No. I was from the roof." Eiji said as if that didn't sound crazier. "It's nice. Fun." He munched on the treat. "Anyway." He said after licking his fingers. He picked up his canvas, paint, and brush. He then went back to the window and started to slide it back open, about to climb out. "I'll be going to my room--"

"Can't you go to your room normally?" Ash exclaimed.

"I can't get past the guards outside my chambers." Eiji sighed. "They won't allow servants in unless I call for them specifically from inside. Or I have to run an errand for the emperor." He said this, shrugging.

Ash could feel a headache coming. Damn him. Damn this palace's strict rules as well. "Do you usually do this?" 

"Occasionally." Eiji grunted. "Just pretend this didn't happen. Didn't mean to interrupt you though. I thought nobody was in. Didn't expect you to still be in here." Then he paused. "What were you doing anyway?"

Ash's face felt warm. "Studying."

Eiji raised a brow. "Studying?"

"Well. I don't know enough about your empire." Ash began. "And if I am to rule this beside you, I think I should learn more about it." It wasn't supposed to be embarrassing, and yet somehow Ash felt self-conscious when faced with his husband, especially with the way he's looking at him, mouth agape and eyes wide. 

"Are those your notes? Can I see them?" Eiji walked closer and stared at the scribbles on the papers littering the table. Ash's penmanship was horrible, and the brush was such a hassle to use, Ash made sure to bring his own inkwell and quill.

Eiji picked up the papers and read through lines and lines of Ash's notes and little anecdotes. He looked fascinated, mouth parting, humming. That was a good sign. "You mistranslated something." He snickered. Wow, Ash wanted smack his face.

"Well, forgive me. It's a little difficult reading about something I barely understand." Ash grumbled. He glanced mournfully at the dictionary and translation guides on the table. He had basic grasp at the language at this point to be conversational enough. He didn't spend those months before marriage being idle, but there were just some parts that escape Ash. 

"You could have said so." Eiji smiled. "I could help you with it. "

Ash furrowed his brows. "Help me?"

"Yes." Eiji was still smiling, reading the pages of Ash's notebook aloud. " _In which reforms must be done. Storehouses for rice be created, and major roads to different cities be built to hasten trade routes. See economic development part for further notes._ I was told you're a scholar. I'm actually interested to see what you think. Do you mind if i hold on to this?" He waved the leather book.

"I'm not yet done with that." Ash huffed, snatching it back. Eiji blinked at the sudden disappearance of the book from his fingers. "I'm still learning. I'll give it to you when I'm done." Ash murmured bashfully. Damn it, why was he suddenly nervous about it?

Eiji nodded. "Alright. I understand. If you need help, you can come to me." He went back to a window, ready to leave. "You can come to my private library anytime for it."

Ash was baffled by the eccentricity of the man. But if this was some kind of olive branch offered to right the mistakes from the past, the. Ash made sure not to question it and instead, take it. "Your highness, wait." He called out before better judgement. Once again, Eiji paused before going out. 

"Yes?" 

Ash sighed. "Um. You don't need to go that way." He fetched a parchment and the emperor consort's seal. "Tell the guards it's urgent and cannot be handled by anyone else. That should get you in."

Eiji stared at the paper he had stamped on. It was a spare parchment from where he practiced writing Izumese. Then he laughed. "Your brush strokes are atrocious. I think I need to teach you how to write as well."

Ash fumed. Yes, his husband was a bastard.

"But thank you." He continued. "It's clever of you." He grinned at him. Ash liked this grin. It was playful, genuine. Very different from the usual stiffness of his face, or the indifferent expression he wore. It felt....warm.

He started to leave from the door, thankfully. But then before he left he turned back at him and said "Your tea has gotten cold. I'll ask someone to take you a new one."

And with that, he left. 

Ash was even more puzzled. 

* * *

Everyone was sitting in a council meeting. Ash was right next to Eiji and at the moment, the ministers insisted on using the gold in the treasury on making more lavish holidays in commemoration for..... something. But there were those opposed to it and insisted the commemoration for something else. Ash lost track of what they were talking about, other than it was in Izumese, and Ash was far from fluent with how fast they snapped at each other. They were getting heated and neither sounded appealing to Ash, and he was half listening to their debates, half with his mind wandering off somewhere else.

"It's rather boring isn't it?" Eiji whispered in York to his ear with a chuckle.

Ash snapped back to the scene before him. "Not really." It was. It really was, and it was ridiculous as well. This was a goddamn holiday for something that wasn't really even religious or cultural when scrutinized, just an excuse to hold a party. They should be discussing about more important matters. "I barely understand what they're talking about."

Eiji smirked. "Well, the minister of culture insisted to make a holiday in my honor. But the minister of religion insisted to do it on my birthday while the other said it would be better to put it on a holy day." He gestured vaguely at them. "Though, all they've done is hurl insults at each other at this point. He said: Fuck you and your ridiculous goatee. The other retorted: I'm not taking fashion advice from a man with ridiculous eyebrows." He chortled.

Ash narrowed his eyes. He may be bad with Izumese, buy he's not that dumb. "Now you're pulling my leg."

Eiji sighed. "Okay yeah. But I do think they're both ridiculous. They've been on this for more than an hour now and it's pretty annoying." Yet another evidence of his wicked humor.

"Shouldn't you do something about it?"

Eiji pressed his lips together. "I confess, I'm not the best at these things."

"With what? Cultural aspects of your country?" Ash stared at the arguing men.

Eiji snorted. "Does that look like a cultural activity to you? It's just the court trying to lick my feet for favors." He continued. "No, I meant the leading. I'm terrible at it."

This was the first time his husband opened up about himself. This was the first time he confessed something to Ash. He was touched...in some way. "I don't think you're so bad."

Eiji rolled his eyes. "Oh please." The people across them continued the argument. It really wasn't such a big deal to Ash's opinion. But Ash understood that Izumo was filled with strange rules, even as spouses, Ash and Eiji had rules. One that puzzled Ash was the need for so much formality. The rules state Ash could not use Eiji's given name and address him only as 'your highness' or 'your majesty', he could not walk beside him and must be five steps before him exactly during a public appearance, they can not have skinship in public, in every banquet, Ash must pour Eiji a glass of wine and when he drank, he must look away from his husband. In a meeting, Ash could not speak unless spoken to, and many many more.

It could get pretty tiresome. And yet, Ash remembered seeing the very same emperor of this complicated empire, climbing the rooves of the palace just the other day. Go figure. Honestly, Ash didn't know what he got himself into. It was all under such chaotic control. 

"What do you think of it then?" Ash nodded subtlety at the council.

Eiji contemplated the scene. "I think we should talk about more important matters. A holiday for the noble lords would benefit the peasants little. It might even inconvenience them." He hummed. "The gold in the treasury could be used for infrastructure or agrarian reforms to help economic development. I believe one lavish party can fund a city's development instead."

Ash eyes were wide. "Wow." 

Eiji raised a brow. "Did I say something wrong?" 

Ash waved his hand in haste. "No no. I'm just amazed. You have thought about this." He folded his hands back to his lap where it should be. "I'm just surprised."

Eiji snickered under his breath. "What? You think such a young kid as me would be incompetent enough to not think about these?" 

"No!" Ash hissed. But actually, upon surface, it sure seemed like it. His husband was so child-like. Not that he'd actually say that to him, gods know he's started too much of a misunderstanding already. Based from what he said though, it was obvious that he's thought about it enough to give an answer like that off the bat. 

Ash cleared his throat. "I'm just wondering, if you have so many good ideas, then why won't you put a stop to this mess," he jerked his head to the scene "and actually talk about them?"

Eiji gave Ash a stunned look. 

"I've barely sat on my throne and you want me to make such grand and ambitious projects?" He spluttered. 

"Why not?" Ash urged. "If you start as soon as possible, more people can benefit from it."

"I'll end up offending the noble lords." 

"I think you forget you're the emperor here."

"I still need their support." 

"You're highness, they're trying to get to your good side. I'm sure if you hint to them that this is how they'll get your favor, then they'll be quick to agree." Ash pointed out. "It's just the right amount of tricking."

Eiji chuckled. "I like the way you think." He patted Ash's hand. "Thank you."

Ash shouldn't be so frazzled with how that hand touched his skin briefly. But the warmth of that hand on his knuckles shot electricity tingling across Ash's body, jolting him into alertness. Eiji smiled at him before addressing his court.

"Gentlemen..."

* * *

At least beyond his work, he still takes time for leisure. One of those was still walking in the garden. He missed the fields of York where he could practice archery or spar with Griffin. He missed his room, he even missed the bitter cold of the winter breeze. He doesn't mind Izumo's temperate climate, but it was too different from what he was used to.

Ash sat on the garden's pagoda. 

Basically he just missed York. There wasn't much for him there but at least he had Griff. At least he had Shorter, and also admittedly Max. And sure Max and Shorter would visit occasionally but that wasn't enough.

He turned the crystal bottle on his hand, the single red rose was preserved as it ever was. Still as red as ever as if he never left the field of York. Griffin's gift was handy, but it made the longing in his heart bigger.

"What--oh woah!" Ash spluttered when something pounced on him. He lost balance and got knocked off his bench. 

"Oh dear. That would have hurt." Thankfully a pair of arms caught him from the back before he fell on the ground. His back was pressed against something firm. He looked up and saw a pair of dark eyes looking at him. 

"Your highness." Ash sucked in a breath. 

"Sorry about that." Eiji straightened him out. "Buddy is a little feisty. He can be a real piece of work." He looked at the golden dog with a disapproving stare. "Isn't that right?" The dog continued with his happy stare before bouncing off to play in the garden. 

Eiji sighed. "Oh he's hopeless." He looked at Ash with a smile. "Can I sit next to you?"

Ash was bewildered. “I’m sure there are rules against that.” As he said, this palace was filled with so much rules. They really weren’t allowed to do a lot of things. In fact, Eiji should be followed by an entourage of servants when he wanted to walk. How he’s allowed alone was a mystery.

“Would you rather I remain standing then?” Eiji arched a brow. “Or do would you rather I sit on your lap?”

“I’ll get up then!” Ash choked.

“I’m just messing with you. Don’t be so uptight with the rules. The gods know we have enough of them.” Eiji sighed once again.

Ash bit his lip. After making up his mind, he scooted over, craned over to see if anyone was looking at them, and then patted the bench. "Sit."

Eiji immediately looked delighted, and then rested next to Ash. He patted Ash's lap in which Ash immediately stiffened. "I didn't expect you to be so fixated on rules. After all, you've been the one who broke the biggest rule of not consummating--"

"Shhh!" Ash yelped. "Do you really have to bring that up every single time?" 

Eiji laughed. It wasn't mocking, not was it meant to be malicious, but simply amused. That didn't mean it didn't annoy Ash. But he looked good laughing. His eyes crinkled shut, and his cheeks flushed. Ash pouted.

"You know, you said so many interesting things while you were drunk." Eiji glanced at him. "Mostly you were nervous about being inexperienced, asking me to wait till you were ready. You were crying. But you were so cute though."

"Ah." Ash's face burned. He wanted to cover his burning face. He used the long sleeve of his robes to block Eiji's piercing stare. "Is that so?"

"Yes." Eiji giggled. "You also talked about missing home. And you endlessly apologized about the flowers. And the unfortunate meeting. All while clinging to me."

Ash moaned. "No that can't be true."

"It is! I tried to pry you away but your grip was so strong. How do you think did you end up waking with you draped all over me? You refused to let go." Eiji grinned at him. "But I suppose your drunk and sober selves are very different aren't they? You're nothing like when you're drunk."

Ash didn't want to face Eiji. He had nothing left to face Eiji with.

"I am sorry about all of those things." Ash mourned. "I didn't know better."

"Yeah I know." Eiji said cheekily. "It became more obvious as the months past. You aren't as cruel as I thought you were. You're just a little...dumb."

"Hey!"

Once again, Eiji laughed. And when that died down, there was silence. For awhile, none of them said anything, content on letting the breeze blow around them.

"I suppose it is a little jarring to be sent off your home to be married." Eiji spoke so suddenly. "I can't imagine being in your shoes. You must miss home."

"I miss York." Ash nodded. "I miss sparring with my brother. I miss him a lot." He wondered how Griffin was doing now, how he was, if he was courting some lady or lord. He'd love to talk to him again, and the letters they exchange are simply not enough.

Eiji took Ash's hand so suddenly, it snapped him out of his daze. "I know! Why don't we spar?" 

Ash blinked. "We?"

"Yeah!" Eiji grasped his hand tighter, eyes sparkling. “Let’s spar!”

* * *

That’s how Ash found himself one day with a York fashioned broad sword Eiji ordered the palace to search for. Eiji brandished his own katana. He was smiling at him from across the training grounds. They have a dojo for it, and so Ash was barefoot on the polished floor, wearing an awkward navy hakama. Eiji was in one as well, hair tied up into a bun.

“Ready?” Eiji grinned at him.

“I’m born ready.” Ash gripped the broadsword. The emperor simply grinned wider, went on a stance and…

They clashed.

It was a flurry of movements after that.

Strangely Ash couldn’t remember the specifics, only that Eiji was laughing the entire time even as he was hard pressed, even as he occasionally lost. Eiji was quick, agile, he was nimble on his feet, striking blow by blow before Ash could retaliate. And Ash matched him before he could slash with his blade. There was no one better between them, both matched in skill.

At least if Ash stopped getting distracted with the way he licked his lips and the strands that fall on his face. Or the flush on his cheeks. Or the slide of sweat down his neck to his clavicle or—

Damn it! Ash was knocked off his feet again. Eiji stood above him.

“Oh dear,” Eiji knelt before him. “You look so shocked. As if I haven’t done that move three times already” He was giggling while pulling Ash back to his feet. “Are you too distracted?”

“I’m not the best at swords!” Ash huffed. “If it was archery though, you wouldn’t stand a chance.”

Somehow that seemed to provoke something within the emperor because his eyes glinted.

“Show me.”

Now Ash was in a field, a bow at hand, a quiver of arrows on his back. Eiji too, had his own set. Eiji nocked his arrow and drew his bow, arm steady, breath calm. After a second or two passing, he let it loose and it hit the target cleanly. Eiji grinned smugly.

“Let me see you do better.”

Ash laughed. Oh he would definitely do better.

It took some time to get used to the arrows and bow, but with enough practice, Ash was able to perfect it. He followed Eiji’s motions from awhile ago and zoned in the target, focusing on that red dot, and that red dot alone. The world faded away, and Ash let his nimble fingers let the arrow loose. It zoomed to his own target.

Then he did this on the next one.

And the next one.

And the one after that.

And then finally, he concentrated enough and managed to pierce through Eiji’s too.

Now it was his turn to look at Eiji smugly, but he saw no bitterness on his face. It simply was filled with surprise, flushed, eyes wide, and mouth parted.

“Wow.”

* * *

After that, he and Eiji were often spending more time together. Mostly it was for work, Ash did give some of his notes to Eiji, but occasionally they would spend some time outside of work. Most of the time, they enjoyed taking walks in the garden.

“The chrysanthemums are lovely. But I miss the roses of York. They were wild roses. They grew everywhere.” Ash nodded fondly as he walked in step with Eiji, admiring the chrysanthemums. Eiji had mentioned about hanami in the spring, and somehow that put them in the mood to view their flowers. Unfortunately, this time, they had a trail of servants following them.

“Do you think the roses could grow on warmer climates?” Eiji gazed at the lotuses on their pond exported from Yuan.

“I think they could.” Ash sighed. He was once again missing York. But he couldn’t think about that too much now. He was emperor consort of Izumo and he had duties, both to York and Izumo. “In my youth, we often visited our castle in Cape Cod. I think there were chrysanthemums growing there too. I hid most of the time in that bush. I wouldn’t forget it.”

“Oh? Is the little prince of York mischievous deep down?” Eiji giggled. He often giggled, but Ash was getting used to the sound of it. It was endearing actually.

“You laugh your highness, but I absolutely recall someone sneaking about the hallways at night last time.” Ash pitched his voice into a whisper, watching the other servants for any signs of hearing them. Eiji’s face was dusted with pink, but he continued to grin.

“I don’t actually suppose you’re interested in joining me.” Eiji arched a brow.

Ash huffed. “Like in sneaking around in your palace?”

“Shh.” Eiji hissed. He looked around. “Yeah. Don’t you agree that having servants follow us can be a bit suffocating?”

Ash stared at the entourage behind them. York definitely didn’t have them. Ash wasn’t used to all that number of people tailing him. It was pretty annoying in his first few days. He believed the servants simply excused him at the beginning because everything was too new to him, but after a month of being in this palace, he was confined with at least three servants attending him. Occasionally, he would be carried in a palanquin, and god that felt even weirder. He just wanted to take a walk near the palace.

“Alright, yes. I’m sick of them too.” Ash groaned.

Eiji clapped his hands. “Great! Meet me in the library at a quarter before midnight.” He beamed. “Try not to be late and don’t wear anything too conspicuous.”

Ash wasn’t even sure what was happening anymore. The next thing he knew was that he was in his nightgown, waiting for someone on a dark room. It’s a little past quarter to twelve and Ash was stuck in the library. How he even sneaked out was a wonder.

“Your highness?” Ash called softly. “Emperor?” He huffed.

He paced around the room.

“Eiji?”

“Sorry.” A figure peeked out of the window, startling Ash. “Had a little trouble with lord Ibe. He took awhile in reporting news from the boarders.” He waved at Ash. “Come on!”

Ash looked around, and then slowly put one foot out, and then another until he was standing on a ledge and holding on Eiji’s hand for his dear life. His other hand was holding a bottle of sake.

“This is crazy.” Ash stuttered.

“Getting cold feet?” Eiji goaded.

“Never.”

“Good!”

They pressed their backs on the wall. They weren’t too high, but Ash was certain they would break something if they fell from this height.

“Ready for some climbing?” Eiji asked. And then they used the ledges to get up the roof. This was scandalous, ridiculous.

Ash loved it.

“Help me up will you?” Eiji grunted. Ash pulled him up with his unoccupied hand. The other stubbornly continued to hold on the bottle of sake. “That’s better.” He sighed and sat on the tiles of the roof, uncorking the bottle and drinking from it. Ash with nothing better to do, sat next to him.

“So this is where you go?” Ash chuckled.

“Yep.” Eiji said while popping the ‘p’. He handed over the bottle. “Want some?”

Ash raised a brow. “You drank it without a glass?”

Eiji shrugged. “If you don’t want it—“

“Give me that!” Ash snatched the bottle and took a large gulp. It burned his throat and he coughed.

“Careful.” Eiji took the bottle back and sipped on it. Ash snorted and went to enjoy the scenery. You could see the entire palace from up there. He could see beyond the walls and peek a little at the city beyond them. You could also see the night sky and the stars twinkling above them. Ash understood why Eiji enjoyed it here.

“I like it here. I used to come here since I was a kid, hiding from tutors and my rather expensive education. I was expected to be emperor since birth. It could get pretty…pressuring.”

“I was the opposite.” Ash admitted. “I was a son to a concubine. Nobody rooted for me to claim the throne. And Griffin was there. He’s the perfect candidate.” He pointed out. “But I was serious with my studies. Always was.”

Eiji sighed. “If you had become king of York, would you have liked it?”

Ash mulled it over. “I suppose I would love to rule a kingdom. I’d probably do a decent job at it. But I am not what York needs. They need Griffin. He’s a better ruler than me.”

“How do you measure greatness anyway?” Eiji pondered. “How do you know what’ best for your people?”

“Don’t kill, steal, and make your people suffer I suppose?” Ash laughed.

“The bar is so low.” Eiji joined in as well.

“Well. Do your best. Put your people before anyone else, even yourself. You’re given power, it should be right that you do what would be the best for them.” To Ash there really was nothing else to it. He didn’t want to be pretentious, nor does he want to be lavish.

“Ah, you make it sound easy.” Eiji took another swig from the bottle. “I don’t think I’m doing this emperor thing properly.”

“You could be doing worse.” Ash took the bottle for his turn. “I remembered one evil douche from our history. Taxed the people too much and he ended up beheaded by his people.”

“Oh we have one like that too! He wanted a summer house built!” Eiji flapped his hands aggressively.

“There was one who decided to wage war against his foreign kingdoms? The war caused so much grievances. He took dead soldier’s wives too.” Ash nodded along, remembering his history classes.

“Eugh. We had one who ignored the plague and continued his lavish parties.” Eiji grimaced. “A lot of the population died.”

“Plagues are the worst.” Ash agreed. “Point it, you being concerned enough? You’re doing okay. Of course, you still need to follow through it.”

Eiji smiled. “Thank you. That actually made me feel better.”

Ash smiled back. “You’re welcome….your highness.”

“Eiji.”

“Hm?”

His husband lowered his eyes, almost shy. “When we’re alone, call me Eiji.”

“Alright.” Ash, for some reason, didn’t even hesitate. “Please call me Ash then.”

Eiji tilted his head. “Ash?”

“It’s a nickname. Only close friends can do it.” Ash remembered fondly. “When I was young, Shorter—er ambassador Wong was crawling through the kitchens to hide from his studies and somehow ran into me. He was covered in soot and ashes, and my shirt was stained. I kept complaining until he nicknamed me ‘Ash’.” He laughed.

“Did he know you were the prince?”

Ash snorted. “No. Imagine his expression when he knew.”

Eiji burst into cackles. Ash grinned.

“Alright,” Eiji sighed as he calmed down. “I’ll call you Ash. This is how you greet people in York, is it not? Let’s do it again, to replace the horrible first one.” He extended his hand. “Good evening, Ash. I am Eiji, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Hello Eiji, I am Ash.” Ash took his hand firmly. He gazed into his eyes. It was the start of a completely new beginning. Ash was glad to say that at least if not love, he found friendship form this marriage. Oh lovely a thought that was. Suddenly, the promise of forever didn’t sound too daunting.

“Please take care of me.”


	3. Bushes of chrysanthemums

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You miss the place,” Griffin continued, unaware of Ash’s uneasiness. “Izumo.”
> 
> And Ash could never lie to his brother, even if he was unwilling to part with the truth he so desperately denied all these days.
> 
> “Yes.”
> 
> He clutched at the carefully folded letter in his grasp.
> 
> “And you miss him? Your husband?”
> 
> Ash shut his eyes and swallowed the lump on his throat that threatened to crawl out of his mouth. It was too tight with emotion, too filled with all the extraordinary feelings within him.
> 
> “Yes.” He confessed. He missed Eiji. He missed him with the bottom of his heart.
> 
> “Wrong.”
> 
> That got Ash to shoot his eyes open. Shocked to even hear Griffin deny him when he was being his most sincere self. How dare he?
> 
> “Wrong.” Griffin repeated. “You love him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh we're coming to an end! To those who stayed from the beginning to the end, thank you.

By the time the bottle was empty, Ash was already flushed to his cheeks, and maybe a little tipsy.

"Alright, alright. But what are those paints for?" Ash slurred with a hiccup. "You always carry them around."

Eiji giggled, obviously intoxicated as well. "I paint." He grinned at him stupidly. "I like to paint. I like the arts better. It's less tedious than political shit." Ash would have laughed at Eiji's lack of filter and straight out cursing. If anyone can hear them, they'd be appalled to hear the emperor curse. 

"I'd like to see them one day." Ash nodded, swaying from the alcohol buzzing in him. "I want to see."

"I'll let you." Eiji patted his shoulder. "I want to paint you too."

"Maybe I'll let you. You have to be quick though. I hate staying still for too long." He mumbled. "One time I was allowed to go to the empire of Helio's library. It had so much stuff in there. Their library is as big as an entire palace and filled with scrolls and tablets and books--anyway. I saw a blueprint for a machine that could make your painting in a single click."

Eiji laughed in disbelief. "No. That's impossible." 

"It is! But it as just a blueprint though. Involved some gunpowder and sparks. You don't need to to stay still too long. I think York is in the middle of crafting it." Ash snickered at Eiji's disbelieving pout. 

"Ah that doesn't sound real at all."

"It totally is!" Ash insisted. 

Eiji snorted in the midst of a giggle. He looked so inelegant, clutching at his stomach. Ash sighed. The moon was full, giving them enough light. The silvery glow bounced on Eiji's cheeks, making him pale under the dark sky. It's a little hard to make anything else out, just half a silhouette of their bodies.

Ash shivered. The night was a little cold, but sometimes the rooms inside were humid so he wore a thin farmer for tonight.

"Hey. Are you cold?" Eiji looked at him with concern outlining his face.

"A little." Ash wrapped his arms around himself. Unlike him, Eiji was in his usual servant clothes. They were thick enough to not feel the chill.

"Aren't you used to the cold in York?" Eiji huffed. There was that usual amused look in him that was simply so obvious no matter how dark it was. 

"Hey. I'm not that immune. And who knew the night would be cold? It's humid inside the rooms and meltingly hot in the mornings in this summer." Ash grumbled. 

"My room isn't that hot. It's pretty cool actually." Eiji pointed out. 

"Well good for you." Ash rolled his eyes. His body trembled a bit. The coolness was settling in, and the warmth of the alcohol was starting to dissipate. 

"Alright. Come here." Eiji wrapped his arms around Ash's body. Ash could feel the heat on his shoulder, his back pressed against Eiji’s firm chest. He felt it back in the garden, when he nearly fell due to the emperor’s dog nearly bounding towards him. He could feel the rise and fall of his breathing. Warmth and coziness, Ash didn’t want to move. Admittedly though, it wasn’t just Eiji’s warmth making him heat up. Ash could feel his face burn at the proximity of their bodies. He could smell Eiji’s scent, chrysanthemums and oils, probably from the oils in his bath. He could smell sweat from their climb, he could smell sandalwood, and maybe a rich earthy scent. Ash tried not to inhale too much of it, fearing it might be weird.

“Better?” Eiji’s voice was near his ears, the whisper was a rumble against Ash, vibrating against him, making him shiver. This time, not from the cold.

“Y-yeah.” Ash choked. They’ve never touched each other like this. They weren’t even allowed to be this close outside their bed. “I feel better. Warmer.” He tried to grin. But Ash thought warm was an understatement though. He felt like he was on fire. Why was he so affected by this?

But Eiji’s touch was too comfortable, too warm. It was lulling Ash to sleep. His eyes were shutting close. This and the buzz of the alcohol was not helping him at all.

“Hey,” Eiji scolded. “You don’t get to sleep here. You’re going to wake up hurting your neck.” He shook Ash awake. Ash grumbled.

“Don’t wanna move. Too…warm.” He presses himself closer to Eiji’s chest.

Eiji snorted. “Come on. Let’s go back. You’re too tired. We can come back some other time.”

Ash wanted to whine, but he felt like that was beneath him. But part of him also wondered if he could somehow convince Eiji if he did.

No. He was definitely not doing that.

“Alright.” Ash relented. “Let’s go back.” He got up and dusted his pants. He extended his hand and pulled Eiji up. He accepted with a grunt. But apparently he was too tipsy than he expected, that he wobbled and ended up knocking the bottle of sake, which then fell to the ground with a large piercing shatter.

“Umm.” EIji winced.

“Who’s there?!” One of the guards bellowed.

“Oh no.” Ash’s breath hitched as the sound of footsteps started to sound louder towards their direction. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“Nope.” Eiji bit his lip. “Run.” He grabbes Ash’s hand and made a run for it. They knew it was too dark to make out the figures, but they still ran as fast as they could, legs bounding towards through the ledge and into the corridor despite the ache in them and the sharpness in their lungs. Eiji was obviously trying to hide his giggling. God they acted like children.

“My room!” Eiji hissed. “It’s closer come on!” He pulled them towards different ledge that could let them sneak into the emperor’s chambers without problem. There were faint outraged voices coming from the outside. Eiji pushed Ash to the bed. It was the same bed he woke up in those months ago after their wedding night.

“Come on, come on, scooch in!” Eiji frantically ripped his robes off and hid them under his bed. Ash was trying to bury himself in the sheets. Eiji jumped in the bed and wrapped himself around Ash, who all but spluttered, but Eiji shushed him to trust him. He was trying hard to stifle his giggling, pressing his lips on Ash's shoulder.

Just then, the door opened and a guard had come in.

“Your highness.” He bowed before them. Eiji got up and plastered on the most displeased expression on his face, as if he was roused from his sleep. The shift was quick, it was almost inspiring.

“This better be good for you to be bold to burst in here and disrupt my slumber." His tone was even. How he does it was a question. Perhaps he was just used enough to it.

The guard swallowed hard. “We thought we heard an intruder. We’re just doing a routine check-up for your own safety. We’ve dispatched it to the emperor consort’s chambers as well.”

Eiji huffed. “No need. He’s right next to me.” He revealed Ash from under his blankets. Ash blinked at the guard with the best confused look he could muster. Eiji continued. "My husband and I were sleeping."

"What's happening?" Ash rubbed his face. Thankfully, he was in his nightdress so it sold the sleeping story well.

Eiji gave the guard another pointed look. "See, we are both fine. No need to worry. We thank you for your services, but I think it's best if you leave now. My husband and I," He glanced at Ash for a second. "Have some things to do now that you've woken us."

The guard visibly reddened. “O-oh. I’m sorry for disturbing, your highnesses.” He bowed and made a hasty retreat. “I’ll tighten the security outside, just in case.”

The door creaked shut. They waited for a bit until they were sure he was gone. Eiji stared at Ash’s bewildered look and—

Ash cackled so hard.

“Oh my gods, have you seen his face?” Ash snorted between wheezes. “Oh my gods.”

Eiji couldn’t help but join in. 

“Okay. We have to do that again.” He sighed. “I haven’t had that much fun in such a long time!” He threw himself back to bed. They kept quiet, breathing the only sound filling the room, staring at the dark wood ceiling. Eiji turned to his side, looking at Ash with parted lips and a flushed face. Ash swallowed hard at such an honest expression.

“Umm…” Ash murmured. “I guess I’m gonna go back to my room—“

“Stay.” Eiji breathed. Ash’s eyes widened at such a bold request. Eiji must have realized as well, because he turned red and spluttered. "I mean--" He tore his gaze away from him abruptly. "The guards are outside, and they wouldn't let you go back. It'll be better to sleep here. I think the bed is big enough! Or if not, I can stay somewhere else, the tatami is also okay--"

"Okay." Ash blurted out. Eiji snapped his mouth shut. "I'll sleep here." Ash continued, heart pounding. "I'll stay."

Eiji's lips parted open. "Oh."

"Yeah." Ash laughed. His nerves were going haywire. "Your bed is cooler. Uhh....less humid. Summer is starting and it's a big problem." 

"Alright."

"Alright." Ash swallowed.

"Let's go to sleep." Eiji offered, already lying down. "We have stuff to do tomorrow."

"Yes." Ash went back to resting his head on the soft mattress. Eiji was trying his best to stay on the other side of the bed, careful not to touch Ash. He was a little guilty about it. 

"Hey." Ash cleared his throat. "You can come closer." 

Eiji looked at him with wide eyes. "Are you sure?" 

"It's okay." 

Eiji nodded. "Alright." He scooted closer to the middle. Ash could already feel the heat of his skin without them even touching. His nerves were tingling all over. He wondered if he's even going to be able to sleep with how tense he's gotten.

"Goodnight." Eiji murmured. 

"Oyasumi." Ash replied.

This made Eiji laugh. Ash smirked. 

He faced away from Eiji's sleeping face and tore his gaze from his figure. He didn't think he'd be able to sleep if he didn't. 

* * *

The summer nights in Izumo only got worse, and Ash's room got even more humid, but he couldn't open a window and risk catching a cold as it was absolutely cold outside. 

Ash was having a mini dilemma about it, and wondered if there was anyway to make the room cooler without getting him ill with a cold. 

"You can move in to my room." Eiji offered while they took a ride through the massive acres of land the imperial palace owned, half of them were farmlands. This was both leisure time and an excuse to check on the other parts of the palace. Eiji wanted a subtle inspection in person, Ash had then obliged when he offered him to join the ride, only requesting that they forgo the palanquin. He couldn't stand being carried like that. Eiji laughed like he was absurd. Of course they were going to forgo the palanquin. 

"Wait what?" Ash pulled his stallion to a stop, his words just starting to sink in. 

Eiji also pulled his horse to a stop. "I'm sorry, was that too forward?" He held on the reigns tighter. "I just thought, since the last time you slept there wasn't so unpleasant, you wouldn't mind sleeping there. It's cooler too." He tipped his chin down and stared at his hands. "It's also technically your room as well."

Ash bit his lip. "I--" His chest was pounding, heat pooling in his gut. He didn't know where that came from. 

That following day when he woke up the second time in Eiji's bed, Eiji had already been awake. He was already in his everyday robes, already ready for the day, and breakfast was about to be served. Eiji had smiled and did the liberty of bringing Ash's breakfast with him, and all Ash managed to do was gape. 

The memory was enough send heat through his body. It felt so tender, so domestic. Well, as domestic as royals could be. But Ash had read books about it, about beautiful scenes of waking up next to a lover, and seeing Eiji like that was nearly akin to the descriptions.

Wait. 

No. Eiji was not his lover. They were duty bound that was all, and somehow they found friendship along the way. This was more than enough. Married, yes, but they weren't lovers and they didn't need to be. This was all simply for convenience. 

Right?

"I should politely decline." Ash gave Eiji a smile.

"I completely respect that choice." Eiji nodded, and Ash was certainly sure that the disappointment lingering in his expression was simply made up in Ash's imagination. "You are always welcome to join me. I'll tell the guards to let you in should you want to."

Ash thanked him for the offer. He doubted he would take it though, he was too embarrassed.

And yet that night, Ash was once again tossing and turning in his sheets. It was too goddamned humid, his back was slick with sweat and his matress was already damp. 

Oh gods, why was his room like this? 

Maybe he just wasn't used to the summer heat. But oh gods. Why?

At this point he didn't even bother anymore. He was desperate and in need. He tightened up his sleeping robes and marches off to the hallway, right into an entirely different wing of the palace, barefoot and in sheer clothes. It didn't matter.

As promised, the guards let him pass by the moment he mentioned wanting to see his husband. He had no hitch in coming to the emperor's chambers.

He slid the door open, padding through the tatami mats, just in time to see his husband shrug on his own sleeping robes, hair once again lose and his glasses discarded over his desk. He was in shock. 

"Ash? Is something wrong?" 

Ash had to shake off the distraction of seeing Eiji once again nearly bare. He wished to see his hair down more often if only the ridiculous bun he had to wear for his crown allowed it. He was getting distracted again. 

"Room too hot. Yours is better." Ash plopped face first on the bed. "Please let me stay." The last part he had said while muffled with the pillows. He half gazed at Eiji for permission even if he knew deep down the emperor would allow it. He was sure his face was already burning. 

Eiji chuckled. "Of course. Go ahead." He sat on the mattress. 

"It's only temporary." Ash murmured. "Until it becomes cool again." 

"If you say so." Eiji slid under the blankets. 

"I say so." Ash whispered stubbornly. 

"Yes yes. Goodnight. Go to sleep." Eiji sighed with a smile on his face. 

"Goodnight." 

Ash spent many nights in Eiji's bed. Months passed and the temperature was already cold enough for Ash to go back to his room anytime.

Ash still spent the night in Eiji's room.

Eiji never asked him to leave. 

Ash never left either, neither did he think to. 

* * *

Seasons had come and gone. The colors of the leaves bled orange from it's much here pigment until it had completely fallen off for the winter chill. Time had passed and Ash was surprised to see that it was already Yule. Or would be if he was back in York, Izumo had no such celebrations and instead had the new year ceremonies to look forward to.

"We can throw a ball." Eiji suggested while he hovered near the fireplace of his private library. "Everyone wants an excuse to party."

Ash laughed. "What happened to 'let's use the gold in the treasury for infrastructure development' talk you made last time?" The roads were being built across the empire for better travels and trade. It was difficult with the vastness of the place, but with Ash's knowledge about basic engineering, they were able to use cheaper materials and faster methods fit for the climate and landscape of each prefecture. 

"I've been frugal this year. One party wouldn't hurt." Eiji shrugged. Ash tried to remember the last banquet they joined in. Ash was there to serve his husband, and the dishes he ate was numbered, the meal was timed, and the dancing was so stiff. It had to uphold elegance more than anything.

"Do you really want to do that?" Ash snorted. He shifter his position on the chair. "I remember how you complained about the way I poured you sake. It was too slow according to you and you were itching to get drunk."

"Banquets like that never let us drunk." Eiji grumbled. "You have a point. Throwing a banquet is a bad idea." He tapped his fingers on the hard wood desk. Ash was mesmerized with the rhythmic tapping on the dark cherry wood. “Why don’t we make it a holiday between us. Just the two of us. How does that sound?”

Ash perked up at this. “Just us?”

Eiji nodded. “Yes, a holiday for lov--.” And then his eyes widened, as if he just realized what he was about to say. “uhm…arranged to be married people. Or friends in such peculiar disposition of being married to each other.” He laughed. “Either way.”

Ash felt his face pinking. His traitorous heart wondering what he was supposed to say. He suppose we are in such a peculiar relationship. Married to each other yet not exactly entangled in a romantic affair. Friends? Much more than that? Ash’s best friend was Shorter and Eiji confessed not being close to anyone, not even his own family. Izumo’s tradition states that children must be raised in a nursery by maids and their own doctors. He was forced to focus on his studies, especially with him as the crown prince. He and his sister hardly spoke to each other. He had no friends growing up.

So Ash had friends, but Eiji...

And Eiji felt different than Shorter. To Shorter he was brash, always trading playful insults and banter. To Eiji they had that too if the entire past months said anything, but it simply felt different. He couldn’t put a finger to it. It was a big unnamable thing looming above them, something Ash did not know how to approach.

“It’s fine.” Ash agreed. “I think it’s interesting.” Plus Ash had always had fun whenever Eiji thought of some new game to play. He never failed to entertain.

“You’ll need to tell me all about Yule” Eiji grinned.

“First off, we decorate a tree.”

“Why would you celebrate winter by decorating a dead tree?” Eiji laughed, thinking of the absurdity of the entire thing.

“Look pines smell great okay?” 

“We’re not cutting a tree.” Eiji snorted. "Let's look for other traditions."

“We kind of just failed the first tradition without the tree.”

“Maybe we can decorate my bonsai? We can’t light it though since the candles might burn it. It’s too small. So maybe we can put diamonds on it. I have an entire jewelry box collecting dust.” Eiji visibly vibrated with excitement. He’s like a child honestly, but Ash should have known this by now.

“Are you really using your imperial jewels for this?” Ash snorted.

“Of course.” Eiji laughed. “Tell me more.”

“There’s carols, and we exchange gifts. And then there’s mistletoe but we’re not doing that.” Ash cleared his throat.

“Why not?” Eiji blinked at him innocently.

“Umm we don’t have mistletoe in Izumo.” Ash deadpanned.

“Oh.” Eiji nodded. “Maybe I’ll ask someone to grow it here for next year.”

Ash tried not to wince. But in truth, he simply could not imagine having to kiss Eiji under the mistletoe. His cheeks burned at the thought of it. They’ve never kissed again after their marriage, never went anywhere beyond friendly touches, and even in Eiji’s bed they keep a physical distance between each other, a line they wouldn’t dare cross. Ash suspected it was because of Eiji respecting Ash’s boundaries, but perhaps he also just didn’t want to. He’s simply uninterested to.

Ash caught his line of thoughts. Why did that bother him? He should have known from the start anyway. He really should have known. They were just friends. Just friends in the most peculiar situation.

“Let’s go try ask if we can serve York dishes for the twenty-fifth.” Eiji grabbed his wrist and led them to the kitchens. “So that it’ll be more authentic.”

Ash laughed. “I doubt you’ll find a turkey to serve.”

“I’ll find a way.” Eiji insisted. “I always do.”

Ash somehow couldn’t help but believe him.

* * *

Ash’s homesickness no longer gnashed within his chest. The pain was no longer sharp like when he first arrived in Izumo, just a hazy blunted feeling that swirled within his chest, bubbling in his gut. It no longer felt like it would swallow him whole when he slept alone in his own bed at night. (Perhaps sleeping next to Eiji helped. Perhaps Izumo started to settle in his bones in way that no longer felt too foreign, that no longer wrapped around his skin in a suffocating way.)

He still wanted to see Griffin though. He feared his memory of his face was slowly fading, the smell of roses in the field no longer fresh on his nose, the colors no longer vibrant. He did not know what to do with this development.

“Hey Ash.” Eiji came over to him while he was writing in his office. “Come with me for a second, I have something to show you!” He didn’t wait for Ash to respond, he simply grabbed his hand and dragged him out of the office while giggling excitedly.

“Where are we going?” Ash spluttered. There were servants along the hallways that carefully averted their eyes as they ran. Eiji was usually careful when in the day, whatever could be so important for this?

“It’s a surprise!” Eiji panted. They were nearing the gardens now, and Ash could see something different from up ahead. “Come on, look!”

Ash’s eyes widened at the sight.

“This is…”

A wide field of roses. Just like those from York. They were there, in a bush among the chrysanthemums.

Ash had no words.

“Do you like it?” Eiji grasped his hand tightly. “I had them imported from York. I wanted to make all of it into roses, but they simply wouldn’t let me uproot them. So we have to make do, I’m afraid--oh my, Ash what's wrong?”

Ash's lips trembled. He was aware that his face was already a little wet, chest bursting with too much emotions. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know what to do.

"Ash? Does this mean you don't like it? Should I get it off? I'll do it if that's what you want. Please stop crying." Eiji fluttered around consciously. He pulled out his own handkerchief for him. Plain white with the embroidery of a golden chrysanthemum. 

"N-no. I'm alright." Ash accepted the cloth to dab at his eyes while he sobbed. "I just never thought I'd see this again. This many roses in a field." He laughed tearfully, embarrassed with how emotional he had become. "It's beautiful."

With this, Eiji beamed. "I'm glad you liked it. I got the seeds imported from York a few months ago, and hired a gardener to tend to it. It's my anniversary gift to you. It's a few months early, because I got too excited." He said excitedly. "And they look better in the spring than in summer, don't you think?"

Oh. He was about to complete an entire year of his stay in this kingdom. Ash didn't notice that much time passing. 

"I suppose you are homesick." Eiji's smile became a little sad. Ash realized he was still holding his hand as he squeezed it yet again. "I hoped this could at least soothe that ache."

"This is more than I could ever asked for." Ash whispered bashfully. His heart wouldn't stop beating of his heart, and the way the man squeezed his fingers, firm yet gentle. He smiled like he was the sun, blinding and warm. Damn him. Damn him and his dangerously beautiful face which somehow became more brilliant when the cold indifference melted away. 

"Oh but it isn't." Eiji let his hand go, and somehow Ash was half tempted to grasp it back again, already missing the warmth of his touch. 

"What do you mean?" Ash didn't know what to do with his hand. It felt too bare. He simple folded it in his sleeve, tucking it away with his other hand. It was neat on his belly. 

"Well. As I said, I figured you would be homesick so I arranged for a ship to take you to York so you can visit your brother and friends." 

Ash's throat felt tight. "Is that allowed?" 

Eiji waved his han dismissively. "As you said, I am emperor." He chuckled. "And I might have said that we need to review our trade details, and perhaps convince King Griffin to share to us some designs of their technological advancements, such as that one that could create paintings quickly, but that is a little unimportant."

"I don't know what to say." Ash laughed. 

"A thank you would do for starters." Eiji grinned. Ash shoved his shoulder playfully, not caring if any of the servants could see them. Eiji giggled. But Ash pulled himself into a more serious and sober expression. 

"Thank you." He sighed with sincerity bleeding his words. "No really. Thank you. You've been nothing but kind to me."

Eiji arched a brow. "I wouldn't say I've been kind to you the first few months." 

"You know what I mean." Ash huffed.

"Yes I know. Now let's walk across this garden. I didn't have them planted so we can bicker in here."

* * *

By the time Ash had to board for a ship to York, Eiji wasn't there to send him off. He had duties, and getting Ash to leave was already causing him trouble. To say that he was disappointed was an understatement, but that was to be expected. He heard about some skirmish along the boarders which needed Eiji's attention, and that had been taking most of his time nowadays.

He spent weeks at sea, but somehow it felt quicker than the first time. The next thing he knew, he was already on the shores of York, Shorter greeting him on the docks. 

"Yo!" The man waved at him and immediately drew him to a hug. Ash was painfully aware of how little the restrictions were in this kingdom. The freedom from rules was strange. "It's nice to see you man."

"It's nice to see you too Shorter." Ash said as he pulled away. "I see you've built up some muscles. You look bulkier." Indeed, the diplomat looked older, changed in the past year he'd last seen him. 

"You've changed too." Shorter patted his shoulders. It was a lot different from the way Eiji patted his shoulders. Eiji's was gentle and warm. Shorter's firm and rough. 

"Have I?" Ash hummed. "I didn't notice."

"Yeah man," Shorter laughed. "You look older. Your hair is longer. I guess you needed to grow it out in Izumo. But most importantly Ash, you look happier."

Ash blinked his eyes. "What?"

"Anyway, we have to ride the carriage. King Griffin is waiting for you. He really missed you, you know? He's looking forward to see you. And I think I have to catch you up on the things you missed." Shorter babbled away. 

Thins really seemed to happen so fast, and a flurry of movements and a couple of gossips tossed his way about how a lady had been caught having an affair with some other noble's wife, how there was a small peasant revolt a few weeks ago after a flood that destroyed their crops, but thankfully were appeased by soldiers helping them rebuilt and some monetary aid. How Griffin has still refused suitors and prospects of marriage. (Ash feared he will become king of York at this rate if his brother wouldn't settle with an heir. If that happened, he will pass the throne to Michael. Surely Griffin would love to have his bestfriend's son on the throne? With Ash already busy in Izumo) Ash had found himself in his old castle.

"Aslan." Griffin greeted him immediately with another hug. Ash returned the gesture and clutched at Griffin's robes with a laugh. Things really were different from the two countries. Ash didn't think he was ever able to hug Eiji. He wondered how it would have felt.

Griffin pulled away with a large grin on his face. "Look at how you've grow, dear boy!" He laughed merrily. "You're almost taller than me now." 

"Hey Griff." Ash sighed. "I missed all of you so much."

"Well, I hope you're hungry because I've asked the kitchens to throw a banquet tonight for your arrival." He was led immediately to the dining hall. 

"Hey kid, how's the married life?" Max was waiting for him there, already seated on the table. 

"Better than yours if that's how you're looking old man. The moustache doesn't suit you at all." Ash snapped back with a grin. Max spluttered.

"Jessica likes the moustache!" 

"On the contrary, I was waiting for you to get drunk tonight so I can shave it off with my sword personally." Duchess Jessica rose and courtsied. "King Griffin, emissary Wong," she said to his brother and to Shorter, then she turned to him. "Brat."

Ash snickered. "Hag."

Griffin chuckled. "The mustache doesn't suit you Max. I prefer my advisors clean-shaven."

Max turned red. "Is that so? I'll shave it off then." 

"Oh so if I tell you countlessly, you still wouldn't listen, but if he tells you, you'd do it in a heartbeat?" Jessica crossed her arms. "Unbelievable."

"Can't do anything about it Jes. It's the king's order." Max shrugged. Jessica sniffed, while Griffin simply smiled. 

"Well, let's not stay here and starve. Let's begin the eating."

* * *

His old bedroom didn't look any different. Physically at least. But somehow it felt bigger than before. That's simply impossible though, his room couldn't have grown size. If anything, it should have felt smaller.

And yet it felt bare, at the same time suffocating. He also never realized how gaudy the decor was compared to Izumo's imperial palace. All the bricks and tapestry surrounding them. There were little windows in his room, only the fireplace to warm the room up.

The floor was also hard marble. The lack of tatami mats was jarring. His bed was too big, too lonely for one occupant. He was vastly aware of the empty space next to him, a hollow where another body usually stayed. He did not know what he was feeling. He didn't know what all this meant.

"Yo Ash--wait you're going to sleep now? You used to sleep late, what happened?" Shorter peeked from the door. Ash forgot that there were no guards outside their rooms like in Izumo. 

"What time is it?" Ash squinted at the clock. 

"It's barely quarter to ten. You used to sleep at three in the morning. What happened?" Shorter sat on the foot of the bed. 

"Can't help it. It's a new habit I suppose." Ash shrugged. "Eiji doesn't like it if I go to bed late."

"Eiji, as in Emperor Okumura?"

"Yeah." Ash chuckled softly, remembering the time Eiji grumbled at Ash's cold limbs when he crawled into bed late at night. Eiji shrieked when Ash slipped his foot through his robe and pushed Ash off the bed. That was a fond memory. 

“When were you first name basis? The last time I knew, both of you hated each other.” Shorter raised his brow, there’s that skeptical look on his face.

“We sort of got along.” Ash rubbed his face. “He’s not really bad. He’s actually a mischievous piece of shit and a bastard. Don’t let that pretty cute face fool you.”

“You think he’s cute?”

“Of course I do. Have you seen him? He’s beautiful. I thought we’ve already established that?” Ash wrinkled his nose. “He’s like a kid, but he’s kind.” He smiled. “He’s really kind and he’s trying his best for his empire.”

“Wow.” Shorter whistled.

“What?”

Shorter stared at him with laughter in his face. He looked so amused by something.

“What’s so funny?”

“Oh man, do I need to spell it out for ya?” Shorter grinned at him. “You. Are. Whipped.”

“What?!” Ash coughed. His chest suddenly hurt. “Where did you ever get that idea?!”

“It’s written all over you, man. Your face nearly goddamn bleeds with it.” Shorter snickered. “You’ve got it bad.”

Ash rolled his eyes over the absurdity of the statement. He couldn’t ever imagine it. “Shut up man.” His cheeks was slightly warm.

“Don’t even try to deny it.” He cackled. “It’s the sex isn’t it? It’s definitely the sex. He gives you some crazy good fucking.”

“Shorter!” Now Ash was fully red. Never mind the fact that he still hadn’t slept with Eiji, or hugged, or kissed, or anything at all despite being husbands. It was too embarrassing.

“Oh the illustrious prince Aslan Callenreese, whipped for an Izumese bunny.”

“Why are you even here? If you’re done, you can leave my chambers.” Ash scowled.

Shorter perked up. “Oh yeah, here. This came over. I assumed one of your servants had it. He said he was order by the emperor to give it to you once you’ve landed.”

Ash snatched the piece of parchment in Shorter’s hand. “You could have started with that.” The paper was one from Eiji’s personal papers. His seal was even stamped on it, the emperor’s seal. He could imagine Eiji writing it, preparing it on the desk in his office just before Ash left, knowing he couldn’t send him off. He clutched at the paper, fingers slowly reaching up to undo the seal. It even smells like chrysanthemums and sandalwood oils, together with the saltiness of the ocean breeze even after the weeks at sea. He was half tempted to press it on his nose and take a deep inhale.

He paused.

“Well? What are you waiting for? Do I need to chase you out of the room?” Ash gave Shorter a pointed look.

“Jeez, fine. I’ll leave you to your lover boy.” Shorter squawked before leaving. Ash rolled his eyes before turning his attention once more to the paper at hand. He carefully pulled at the seal, opening the letter for the contents.

_Ash._

The first sentence read.

_By the time you’re reading this, I hope this meant you are already safe at York. There is a formal way of writing letters here in Izumo, but you know me, I never liked tradition, and you are the one person who I can do this to._

_I hope you stay for as long as you need, although preferably not longer than a month, or the noble lords would kill me. There is not much for me to say, only that I probably will miss you. But you’ve been too far apart from your family, and I at least you this much._

_Your friend,_

_Eiji_

_P.S. I think Buddy will miss you too. Somehow he’s very attached to you, even though I am his master. I’m almost jealous. I suppose we have that alike._

Ash mourned the shortness of the letter. But it was enough for now. He pressed the paper on his chest. He could imagine Eiji writing this though. The image of him spreading the parchment on his cherry wood desk, dipping his brush on the inkwell, tongue sticking out of his lip as a habit while pondering over what to write. Ash guessed he’d have written about five of these, always changing the words before finally settling on what he found best. He had always mourned about writing letter, having not known what to say.

Yes. It’ll have to be enough for now, this letter from his husband which he’s worked so hard to write. He sets the paper on the pillow next to his and slept with a smile on his lips, instantly feeling better.

* * *

The weeks passed by in his stay in York and somehow everyday seemed to stretch for eternity. Ash had done most of what he did before leaving for Izumo, and yet he found something melancholic about it, like a great feeling of loss, a bittersweet nostalgic thing that simply felt wrong.

In the second week of his stay, he clutched at Eiji’s letter, running his thumb over the paper countless of times, rereading it till he memorized all the words by now.

Somehow the fields of roses that he kept for so long in his memories was not as fragrant as he remembered it. It was not as brilliant and as vibrant either. It felt like an ordinary field. There always seemed to be the lack of color in them. He should have been staring at bushes of chrysanthemums, but there were none here. Only roses.

“You seem deep in thought.”

Ash stood up as Griffin walked by and bowed.

“There’s no need for that.” He laughed. “I see Izumo has influenced you a lot.”

“Sorry.” Ash murmured. “I’ve picked up some new habits.”

“I see that.” Griffin sighed. “You look sad, Aslan. What is the matter?”

Sad? Did he look sad?

“I’m not.” Ash insisted. “On the contrary, I’m happy. I’m back home.” He meant it. He missed Griffin. He missed talking to his brother.

“Oh I missed you too Aslan, and you know you’ll always have a place here.” He murmured. He sat next to him on the bench. “But I don’t think you consider this your home anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

Griffin’s smile was between sadness and joy. A bittersweet feeling as well. “Your mind may tell you one thing, but your heart says another. Your mind is here with me, in York, but your heart is left somewhere else.”

Ash felt like he understood, but he didn’t want to talk about it at all.

“You miss the place,” Griffin continued, unaware of Ash’s uneasiness. “Izumo.”

And Ash could never lie to his brother, even if he was unwilling to part with the truth he so desperately denied all these days.

“Yes.”

He clutched at the carefully folded letter in his grasp.

“And you miss him? Your husband?”

Ash shut his eyes and swallowed the lump on his throat that threatened to crawl out of his mouth. It was too tight with emotion, too filled with all the extraordinary feelings within him.

“Yes.” He confessed. He missed Eiji. He missed him with the bottom of his heart.

“Wrong.”

 _That_ got Ash to shoot his eyes open. Shocked to even hear Griffin deny him when he was being his most sincere self. How dare he?

“Wrong.” Griffin repeated. “You love him.”

What Griffin said was a surprise.

But Ash wasn’t able to ponder too much on it because just as he said it, a new messenger came panting to the gardens having gone to a run.

“Your highnesses, urgent news from the empire of Izumo. The message bears a seal from the emperor himself, and I was told it was top priority to be sent directly to the hands of prince Aslan.”

Ash wasted no time in snatching the paper and reading the contents, never mind that Griffin was still there.

_Ash._

_I know I said to take your time, but duty calls upon us. I regret to ask you to come back so soon when you had just reunited with your family. The boarder skirmish had turned into a full rebellion, and I must ride to the south to settle it. I need you to come back and rule over the imperial palace in my absence. I trust you and that your choices have nothing but the best interest of our people._

_With Urgency,_

_Eiji_

* * *

Ash was on the next ship to Izumo.

That ship ride back was the most agonizing thing that tested on his patience.

Lord Ibe was there to greet him. He was appointed regent while Ash was on his way.

“Ei—my husband? Where is my husband?” Ash said the moment he stepped on the ground.

Lord Ibe’s face was harried. “The last we heard of him was that he and his troops were engaged in battle. We haven’t received further correspondence. This was five days ago.”

“When did this rebellion start?”

“Only about days after you left for York, your majesty. This had been building up since in the past.” Lord Ibe led them quickly to the carriages.

Ash pondered. It was almost a month. Eiji was off fighting for nearly a month and Ash was lounging in York like a fool. His husband was in danger.

“I need to ride to him. I can help him!” Ash thought desperately.

“No. You need to stay. So many noble lords are eyeing the chrysanthemum throne. Gods know how much I tried to keep it from their dirty hands.” Ibe insisted.

Ash was pained to admit it, but he was right. He needed to protect Eiji’s throne by occupying it. He needed to run the empire as emperor consort of Izumo. It was his duty. It was the rules.

Ash had never hated the rules more than before.

* * *

Months passed, and Ash heard little news about Eiji. Only reports from the battlefield came in. His first anniversary had passed and he had already turned eighteen. Eiji was only twenty and he’s off fighting. There were reports of them pushing the line back, and perhaps they would be done before winter, but that simply wasn’t easing Ash’s mind.

He needed Eiji to be here next to him. He needed him smiling next to him. Ash needed him to be alive. He needed him. All of this while he had to battle multiple noble lords, continuing progress for social and economic prosperity, managing everything Eiji left behind. He was the emperor consort, and he refused to be widowed just before he could enjoy his life as a married man.

Because had beastly wants and closely held secrets he only wished to share with Eiji, which he could only ever trust him to understand. Foolish desires, and one of them was that maybe, maybe Eiji would somehow fall in love with him despite how illogical it sounded, and they’d find that they were meant to be after all, some kind of soulmates amongst the parallel universes that existed like theirs.

Ash was ready to offer his heart to him should he want it, should he show some slightest traces of wanting it, because Ash was a goddamn romantic deep down despite how cynical he showed himself to be. And god he just wanted to be loved so badly. He wanted to love Eiji so badly, so desperately.

He wondered if beyond that impenetrable stare, that unfathomable warm eyes, beyond all that, if there was any possibility that Eiji loved him back.

Yes. He loved Eiji Okumura.

He loved him with the bottom of his soul. He loved him till his heart bled. He loved him from miles away and even if he was an inch apart. He loved him.

And this was the most earthshattering and predictably unsurprising discovery he’s ever known.

“Your highness, we have news about the emperor.” A guard had sent a hastily passed it to Ash. He read the note.

“It’s said they have suppressed the uprising.” Ash felt his chest bloom with relief and pride. He continued. “But emperor Okumura was injured from battle and must see a doctor as soon as possible.”

Ash felt lead fall on his stomach.

Eiji was injured.

Oh gods.

Ash was ready to go crazy had it not been improper with his audience. He had responsibilities, but gods damn it. He didn’t want to just wait for Eiji to arrive.

Days passed, and each day was filled with nothing but anxiety and dread. Until finally the gatemen had announced the arrival of the emperor. Ash did not hesitate to run to meet him. Rules be damned. Hallways upon hallways, servants looking at him with disdain. None of that mattered.

In the courtyard, he could see that figure. The body was bulkier, less spring in his step. The hair was longer, and the skin paler, but Ash knew him. He knew him if he had to be blindfolded. He would know him by touch alone.

“Eiji!”

Ash yelled. The figure looked up and saw him bounding towards him.

“Ash? Is that—Oomf!” Eiji giggled while receiving an armful of Ash who all but launched himself towards him.

“You idiot!” Ash sobbed. “Take care of yourself damn it! I’m glad you’re alive!”

Eiji laughed. “I’m okay. I’m back and I’m fine.”

Ash pulled away. “They said you need a doctor as soon as possible. You got injured!” He berated. “How is that fine? I thought you were going to die!”

“I just got stabbed, but it missed the important organs. I’ll need a doctor to check it out, but I’m not dying I swear.” Eiji held on his cheeks. “I’m not gonna die. But I would prefer if you get off me a bit. My stitches are going to reopen at this rate.”

Ash immediately jumped off. “I’m so sorry.” He was mortified. “Oh gods.”

Eiji continued laughing while clutching at his gut from where he was wounded. “Did you miss me that much? I’m glad you haven’t traded me off for a mistress.”

Ash simply pouted as he smacked Eiji on the face. 

* * *

It felt like eternity since they slept together in one bed. Eiji was stripped off of everything to make his wounds more comfortable. There was one on his thigh, and another on his back to accompany the one on his gut. He was wrapped in bandages, and he told Ash of the story behind each wound. He told him of stories while they were apart. And Ash relayed what happened on his side.

Ash held his hand at every word Eiji uttered. Sometimes it was fun, sometimes it was sad, sometimes it was so goddamn painful it made Eiji’s breath hitch and his hand would tighten around his fingers. Ash made sure to listen to them. He made sure to take it all.

“Ash.” Eiji murmured while they contemplated in silence. They had retired early, but it wasn’t time to sleep. They couldn’t sleep.

Ash blinked at him, ready to do anything at just an utter. “Yes?”

“You look like you want to say something.” He chuckled.

Ash bit his lip. Could he say it? Could he confess what was plaguing his mind for the past months?

“I have nothing to say.” Ash hides his cowardice by smiling.

“Ash.” Eiji began again with such a tender tone. “I know you. Just say it. I won’t get mad, or laugh, or tease you with it.”

Damn him. Damn him for knowing Ash’s soul.

“Promise you won’t?” Ash needed that assurance. Was he a kid again?

“I promise.”

Ash had let all those month parted boil down within him, all those emotions, all of it. He let it all spill out until he was covered by it, till he had nothing to give.

“Eiji,” Ash shut his eyes. How could he possibly say it? How could he let all of these out? How should he convey it so he would not be misunderstood? What form of eloquence must he have to get Eiji to know the truest parts of his soul?

Damn it all.

“I think I love you.”

A pause.

Silence.

Nothing.

Ash cracked an eye open and saw Eiji’s red face.

“W-what?” Eiji managed to croak.

Ash took a deep breath. “I love you.” He tried to say as calmly as possible even though his heart was going to burst. That was all he needed to say. “Anyway. Let’s go to sleep. We have an early day tomorrow—“

“No. We are not sleeping till we talk about this.” Eiji gripped Ash’s wrist. His face looked serious. It sent a small pang of fear through Ash’s chest.

“Do we need to?” Ash whined desperately. Of course they needed to.

“Is it true?” Eiji sounded urgent, pleading. “Tell me honestly.”

Was Ash ever going to lie to him?

“Yes.”

Eiji’s face softened. “Not because of duty?”

Ash shook his head. “Never.”

Then, Eiji’s smile widened. ”Good.”

And the next thing Ash remembered were lips on his own, warm and a little rough. Hands were pulling the front of his robes and Ash’s eyes were fluttering shut.

“Wow.” Eiji whispered when he finally pulled away. “I’ve always wanted to do that.”

Ash blinked his eyes open. Eiji was grinning at him as he let the words sink in.

“Does that mean you--?”

“Yes.” Eiji nodded. “I do. I love you Prince Aslan Callenreese, son of York, emperor consort of Izumo.”

Ash snorted. “Must you say it that way?”

“It’s better than your confession.” Eiji laughed. “Seriously, who does it like that?”

“It was effective.”

“You nearly gave me a heart attack!” Eiji groaned. “I’ve dreamed of those words far too much, I thought I had gone insane.”

“You have?” That was news to Ash.

“Yes!” Eiji sighed. “All this time!”

“Oh.”

Eiji laughed hysterically. “I was madly in love, it was ridiculous. From the marriage bed, when you offered me to break the rules, I was besotted. Damn. You'd think you would notice earlier."

Ash really didn't know how to deal with it.

"So all this time, you teasing me about that night--"

"I wanted to know if your feelings had changed. It seemed that you still didn't want to." Eiji sighed. "And it was a way for you to break the marriage if you really loathed me. It would have rendered out vows null. You could have always left all this time." 

Ash was too shocked to make a thought.

"Either way, I know you returned my feelings. We can worry about it another time--"

"I want to do it." Ash cut in. "I want to deal our wedding." 

For the second time of the night, Eiji's face was red. "A-are you sure?"

Ash stared into those dark eyes. "I've never been more sure in my life." He grasped his hand and led it to his chest. "Take me. Please take me so I would be your husband forever. I want to give you my everything. Claim me now Eiji."

Eiji's breath hitched. His eyes darkened at Ash's words. He panted. "There'll be no turning back."

"I don't want to."

Then Eiji grinned widely. "Good."

That night, Ash gave his husband his all.

* * *

Weeks passed, and Eiji was slowly recovering. They were once again walking in the garden when Ash insisted on having them sit by the pagoda, overlooking the bushes of roses and chrysanthemums. 

"What do you want to do that has you so excited?" Eiji giggled. 

"Remember that machine i told you?" Ash grinned. 

"Oh no, it's here?!" Eiji stared at the rather peculiar metal object. "This is it?"

"It's called a camera." Ash explained and Eiji examined at it with wonder. "But before that." He knelt on his knees and pulled out a box.

"Ash what's this?" 

Ash cleared his throat. He was getting shy. "We didn't have a proper engagement, and frankly the steps were all messed up, but," he opened the box and presented a simple golden band on the box. "I want to do it again."

"Ash..." Eiji's lips wobbled.

"I understand if you want to keep the old ones--"

"They're passed down by tradition. They're my grandparents'." Eiji exclaimed.

"And I know you hate tradition." Ash explained.

"Yes." Eiji laughed like a kid. "Yes I would use them. Oh gods." 

So Ash smiled and slotted the ring on Eiji's finger while he did the same to Ash. He admired the band on his finger. 

"I can't believe we got married, fell in love, fucked, and got engaged." Eiji giggled again. "What a mess." He beamed at Ash. "Technically you propositioned me to be your concubine first."

"Let's not mention that." Ash gritted his teeth. "Sit here. Let's get a photograph taken in commemoration for the day." They were in a nice back drop, field of Chrysanthemums and roses where they were at home. "Look at the lens, and don't blink."

Eiji sighed and followed. The photographer stood behind the machine and started to count.

"One..two..there.."

A flash.

Ash thought happily.

Yes. Perhaps Griffin was right. 

This was home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's too early. I will edit this later

**Author's Note:**

> Gonna be real. I'm not as satisfied with this as I want to be but I wanna play around with the idea of Ash and Eiji not liking each other from the first moment around. So it pains me to not have them all over each other at first sight, but here we are. A comment would be nice


End file.
